Tag Archives: homestuck

Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 49: Therapist Manipulation Station

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Introduction

< Part 48 | Part 49 | Part 50 >

Act 5 Act 2, Part 22 of 32

Pages 3614-3635 (MSPA: 5514-5535)

alternate post title: Stop Listening to Doc Scratch You Imbecile

alternate alternate post title: the “I wish this was my 50th post” special

We once again switch perspectives to Doc Scratch, who controls the narrative for a while. He says:

[In fact, I think it would be for the best if I commandeered the narrative completely for a while. I trust you won’t mind if I speak in white. It’s not actually negotiable, but as a courtesy I will enclose my words between a pair of visually audible brackets.

I am doing this because I can.]

(god I can already tell it’s gonna be a pain in the ass to format his pesterlogs when I quote them)

(even more now in WordPress than in Blogger, actually)

As we learn here, Scratch is the only character so far who is aware that he is in a story. Well, I guess also Hussie’s self-insert, but that’s a special case. What role does this fourth wall awareness play in the story? Mostly just meta shenanigans I believe. They can be fun, but it’s important to note that they are NOT the main point of the story. People often come up with meta justifications for why Act 7 was an unsatisfying ending (e.g. the idea that the kids escaped the story by entering the victory door), but I feel that escaping the story is no excuse for leaving so much stuff unresolved.

Also regarding this, Let’s Read Homestuck cleverly handles Doc Scratch’s fourth-wall narration which doesn’t make sense in video. Scratch says in the videos that the idea of “visually audible brackets” makes no sense to people watching the videos rather than reading the comic, but as an excellent host he must remain faithful to the comic’s script. I think that speaks for itself, going along very nicely with the theme of his fourth-wall awareness.

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Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 48: Bored Superdogs and Memory Revelations

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Introduction

< Part 47 | Part 48 | Part 49 >

Act 5 Act 2, Part 21 of 32

Pages 3546-3613 (MSPA: 5446-5513)

Only in Homestuck could this picture make any sort of sense. Even then…

NOTE: I’m really blitzing through Act 5 now (by which I mean going about 30% faster), and boy am I proud of that.

NOTE 2: As school is ending, I have a big project over the next few weeks which I have to work a lot on. This means that I’m slowing down posts somewhat, with the next three posts weekly instead of every five days. Next post coming Sunday.

: (

We now focus on what Jack Noir is up to. He just killed Dad and Mom offscreen. As with Nepeta, it’s a bit of a relief we didn’t have to see them die onscreen; showing a guy killing two loving parents of main characters in love together would obviously be even more heartwrenching than anything we’ve seen so far. Compare this to Bro, who got an onscreen death scene. This is probably not because he is (arguably) not as likable as the other guardians, rather because his death was the culmination of a fight, while the other two were just on a date when it was suddenly interrupted. If John’s dad was in a fistfight with Jack and lost when Jack became more powerful, he would no doubt get a full death scene.

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Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 47: Fairy Psychopomps and Sudden Vampires

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Introduction

< Part 46 | Part 47 | Part 48 >

Act 5 Act 2, Part 20 of 32

Pages 3479-3545 (MSPA: 5379-5445)

And wordy journals.

Terezi just went missing after having caught up with Sollux when all of a sudden, we’re back to a flashback of Dave fooling around on his bro’s Xbox gaming system. One hell of a mood whiplash alright.

The puppets are all like, haha did you miss me?

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Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 46: F33lings Jams A8ound

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Introduction

< Part 45 | Part 46 | Part 47 >

Act 5 Act 2, Part 19 of 32

Pages 3438-3478 (MSPA: 5338-5378)

NOTE: I’m really sorry about the late post today. Walkaround games always take a good while to write commentary on because I need to capture pictures and use online transcripts and everything. To make up for it, this post is a pretty long one.

It’s time for a third troll walkaround, this time focused on Equius and Nepeta. The main point of this walkaround is to give those two trolls a decent final scene before they bite the dust. And their dialogue really does flesh out both of them. Arguably it’s bad that they got some heavy dialogue and then promptly got offed, but Hussie said that if they didn’t get any such parting dialogue the complaint would be that they got no parting dialogue. 

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Cookie Fonster Says Stuff About His Homestuck Commentary 6: Over But Not Quite (the comic, not the post series)

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So today was the final update of Homestuck. Except it isn’t quite the ending, since Hussie talked about making a final epilogue in the future. It still left a lot of plot points unresolved and we’ll probably have to wait still more months for the grand epilogue, but that’s besides the point. The point is, I want to say stuff about my post series now that Homestuck is semi-finished.

I originally intended to make this post series once Homestuck is over, because with that, the posts wouldn’t feel incomplete with inaccurate predictions or stuff I could say now but couldn’t have said back before the comic ended. The comic was supposed to be fully finished when I started this post series, with all plot points resolved.

Except the plot points aren’t solved. We still don’t know:

  • what happened to Lord English
  • the full story of Caliborn’s timeline and how he became Lord English
  • the deal with the cherub universe vs. the one the kids created
  • the full story of how Gamzee’s timeline went down (like what happened to him after we last saw him in [S] Collide?)
  • what events came before and after Caliborn’s Masterpiece, or where exactly (like from which timeline) the kids there came from
  • what ultimately happened to the Green Sun or the god tier version of Calliope
  • the purpose of destroying the Green Sun
  • what Vriska and company did with the magic chest
  • whether Vriska and the other trolls will too settle on Earth
  • what’s going to happen to the ghosts from Game Over
  • which ships will be canon in the end (this is kind of a joke thing, but seriously, that sort of thing is usually answered in the end of stories like this*)
  • what happened to all the sprites
  • what happened to (John)
  • what happened to everyone else who didn’t enter the victory door (Ms. Paint, Jack Noir, the Felt, whoever else)
  • the whole deal with Karkat’s supposed universe leadership role which the flash didn’t address at all
  • the ramifications of Terezi gaining pre-retcon memories
  • the thing of restoring the troll race (or the human race for that matter)
  • what all the classes and aspects mean for our resident theorists
  • probably some other stuff I forgot to list
  • to say nothing of the smaller plot points that have been hanging for a while (here’s a list someone made of unresolved plot points).
  • and to say nothing of character interactions we’ve been hoping would happen but haven’t gotten yet. When will Jade get her touching young guardian reunion? When will Jade have her dialogue reunions with everyone else for that matter? When will the alpha kids, with their absolute social trainwreck, have their grand reconciliation?

* For one thing, it was practically guaranteed at this point that John would get together with Roxy by the end. The Act 7 flash kind of implied this? But only kind of.

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Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 45: Everything I Know Is Turning Magic

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Introduction

< Part 44 | Part 45 | Part 46 >

Act 5 Act 2, Part 18 of 32

Pages 3415-3437 (MSPA: 5315-5337)

Man, when was the last time the title picture was at the start of the stretch of pages the post covers?

Picking up from where we left off, John went on a car ride with WV?* and is now talking to Jade in another long pesterlog.

* The question mark notation for the exiles before they became exiles always confused me in my first read. I think I interpreted the question marks a little too literally; I kind of thought it was supposed to indicate stuff on the order of, “is this guy WV or is it not?”

EB: hey jade, are you there? i have a computer now. 
EB: this boring guy keeps blinking at me though, and it’s weird. 
GG: john!!! 😀 
GG: wow, finally! 
EB: hi! 
EB: sorry i disappeared after you entered the game… 
EB: but from what i have seen in the clouds, it doesn’t look like you have had much trouble making progress! 
GG: nope! 
GG: dave was able to set up as my server player 
GG: he is building up my house right now so that we can deploy some equipment up there 
EB: oh, nice! 

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Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 44: Black Comedy Investigation Station

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Introduction

< Part 43 | Part 44 | Part 45 >

Act 5 Act 2, Part 17 of 32

Pages 3360-3414 (MSPA: 5260-5314)

Yet another title picture that doesn’t match the post’s name.
I would’ve done something from the investigation scene but I’m avoiding having spoilery title pictures.

NOTE: Next post will be April 10.

This is the picture accompanying Karkat’s memo.
We just got done seeing evil Gamzee, so this is some pretty strong juxtaposition.

To kick things off, Karkat starts up a memo to warn his friends about murderous purple-bloods on the loose.

CCG: THE WORST CASE SCENARIO HAS HAPPENED.
CCG: THE BARD OF RAGE IS ON THE LOOSE. 
CCG: YEAH, I KNOW WE ALL THOUGHT THAT TITLE WAS A JOKE, BUT IT TURNED OUT IT WASN’T. 

This is the official reveal of Gamzee’s god tier title; he’s no longer the Bard of Fuck I Forgot. As I said last post, Gamzee’s god tier title most likely wasn’t revealed earlier because it would be too obvious of a hint that he’d become evil.

Also, it’s interesting how the trolls apparently all thought Gamzee’s title was a joke. Did nobody find his title the least bit foreboding? Or did they think that was merely an example of the idea that titles are meant to challenge players? Come to think of it, it’s probably the trolls thinking the idea that people are sometimes in some way the opposite of their title, which has been brought up a few times. I’m not sure, but really, it would make sense for the title to be at least a little ominous.

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Cookie Fonster Says Stuff About His Homestuck Commentary 5: Holding Off Posts, Probably

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So Homestuck, the comic I’ve been blogging about for nearly half a year now, just resumed. And when I saw the news, I got super hyped to read it; heart beating, fingers twitching, loads of energy within my body that can only be released through running and jumping around. It sounds like a story of a guy preparing for the BIG GAME (it’s sports) rather than a random dude finding that the famed webcomic he’s overly invested in has updated after 8 months of pause, but that’s exactly what I felt like.

Lots of thoughts are running through my head about everything that went down in the new update. So many that I feel that working on my Homestuck post series during that time will interfere with those thoughts. During that time period I’ll mostly hold off posts to collect thoughts.

According to the news post the final updates are as follows:

3/28-4/2: 125 pages of updates

4/3-4/5: no updates

4/6: End of Act 6 animation(s)

4/7-4/13: 40 pages of updates, last one is the entirety of Act 7, the final act

So here’s my tentative plan. Unless I feel like making these posts again during the updates (which is entirely possible given how much I’ve failed to stick to plans with this post series), the series will progress as follows. Next post will be April 5, with the pause before the EoA6 update to write most of it. Although there’s no guarantee that’ll happen, the extra time might, and I say might, make the next post be super-length. Next post after that will be a bit after the 13th, then back to posts everfy five days. Maybe I’ll also write posts about the final stretch of updates during/after it’s all posted.

Like I said, I’m posting my reactions to the updates on my Tumblr. So if you want to keep up with my ramblings about that weird anime with those gray horoscope aliens during the final stretch of updates, go there. 

Cookie Fonster Says Stuff About His Homestuck Commentary 4: After the Comic Resumes

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So I was browsing the various Homestuck discussion boards and stumbled upon this Reddit post, which leaked news from one of the author’s friends that the comic is already finished, it would resume very soon, and end next April 13, its seventh anniversary. Previously readers were led to believe it would resume April 13 by extrapolating from the following values: on February 1, 2016, the end of Act 6 was 30% finished, and on March 7, the end of Act 6 was 65% finished, placing the completion date and by association the time the comic resumes nicely at April 13. But seeing the news that it’ll resume probably in late March is quite a shock. I was prepared to make this post about the blog after the comic resumes a few days before the comic’s birthday, but now I guess I should make that post right now.

On April 13—previously the presumed resume date and now the designated end date of Homestuck—my post series should be around page 5500. That’s a good ways into the section of Act 5 Act 2 known as Murderstuck, and not far from the Doc Scratch intermission. I guess this means that the portion between where I am now and roughly page 5500 will be the portion I’m commenting on during the comic’s final stretch of updates. I was kind of hoping to comment on more stuff during that time, but I’m sure I’ll have interesting stuff to say during those two weeks or so.

What’s good about this whole thing is that much of my commentary posted before the comic resumed will probably be funny in hindsight, maybe with some on-the-dot accurate predictions, maybe with some predictions that were completely different from what really happens. After the point I’ll be at when Homestuck has its grand finale, my post series will go as I originally wanted it to be: done after the comic is complete and all plot threads are resolved. I was kind of hoping to be further through my post series at that point but whatever. Though it would have been cool to do this whole project after Homestuck is over, it’s fun in hindsight to see what I thought might happen after the comic resumes.

Something else: I plan on blogging my reaction to the final updates as they are posted as many readers do, most likely on my Tumblr blog. I posted my reaction online for parts of the previous stretch of updates but not the whole thing, largely out of laziness.

Also, happy Easter everyone.

Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 43: The Evil Juggalo Nightmare

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Introduction

< Part 42 | Part 43 | Part 44 >

Act 5 Act 2, Part 16 of 32

Pages 3321-3359 (MSPA: 5221-5259)

NOTE: Sorry the post’s two days late. So much for spring break giving me a faster schedule.

Up next is another walkaround, similar to Alterniabound but with a somewhat different, more worrisome tone. If you take a moment to examine the items scattered across the floor, there’s so much dramatic irony (thinking Vriska is harmless and Tavros is alive and well) and worries as to where everyone is, especially Gamzee.

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