Monthly Archives: October 2016

Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 72: Gray and Purple Plot Dumps

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Introduction

< Part 71 | Part 72 | Part 73 >

Act 6 Intermission 2, Part 1 of 3

Pages 4667-4708 (MSPA: 6567-6608)

Delicious plot dumps if I say so myself.

EDIT (12/14/2016): Shit, I forgot to rant about how weird illogical the supposed retconned version of the penis fight scene was. Better luck next time I guess.

EDIT (10/5/2019): After a really good streak for over 30 posts, this is where my Homestuck posts start reading like garbly nonsense again—makes sense because this is where my posting schedule started to slow WAY down. I have no idea what I was thinking when I wrote about half the stuff I said in this post, so I didn’t even bother making many edits to it, just so you’re warned.

Hold still, Slick.

After a terrifying montage of the world turning into a flooded alien queen wasteland, suddenly Hussie is trying to feed Spades Slick lusus milk. I must say, this sudden mood switch makes for a surprisingly good transition device.

Amidst all this hilarity, if you stop to pay attention to things a whole bunch of stuff is happening. First off, Hussie is cosplaying yet again, this time as an interpretation of what Calliope might look like. He presumably rescued Slick from the destruction of the trolls’ universe, and gave him some robotic upgrades. The deal with Slick is that the comic consistently refuses to kill him off*, and now Hussie displays a comical obsession with keeping him alive, full out making fun of this recurring motif. I swear to god if he doesn’t turn up alive once again after being killed off in the stupidest way possible…**

Oh, and Aurthour is alive again too somehow? As with Minihoof that’s yet another weird inexplicable horse thing.

* I knowwwwww 😦

** That sentence can also be read as Slick turning up alive in the stupidest way possible, which is semi-intentional. But getting more stupid that self-insert shenanigans requires a bit of creativity.

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Thoughts on the Homestuck Ending Credits

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Today Homestuck updated with a short interactive page, followed by a credit roll plus photo montage. And you know what? I actually truly honest to god enjoyed it. My reaction to it was much like my initial reaction to Collide: it made me forget all my salt about late Homestuck, which is kind of a mystical effect. The update addresses a lot of things Act 7 left unresolved, like bringing back the human and troll races and what happened to Terezi; it even gives Jane and Jake a semblance of satisfying arc resolutions!

But the end credits and Collide both had a certain flaw that make them almost perfect. In Collide that flaw is Slick getting killed off; the end credits, meanwhile, don’t at all address John’s blatant romantic tease with Roxy, which is saying a lot because the credits feature two characters getting married, which feels surreal to even say. But since I don’t like being pessimistic about hopes for the future of Homestuck, I’m still hoping that pairing is addressed somehow in the epilogue. I would say more but the next post after the one I’m working on is a PERFECT time to discuss that ship.

Despite that problem, the end credits make me a good deal less salty about Act 7, something that should logically be impossible but somehow isn’t. Now what do those credits mean for this post series? Pretty much what the first Homestuck updates after I started this post series meant: I’ll have more stuff to think about differently in retrospect, and might complain about stuff a tiny bit less?

Happy Cascade Day everyone.

Homestuck 10/25 Teaser Analysis

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So if you’re active on the Homestuck subreddit or whatever then I’m sure you’ve seen this thing:

It seriously looks like Hussie art! That’s a pretty good sign.

There’s no way this isn’t a teaser for the “post-canon content” coming tomorrow, on the ever-fabled Cascade Day. And this image is kind of worth analyzing in terms of which characters Hussie cares about.

First off, Jade isn’t there. Neither is Jane, or Jake, or Terezi. All those characters have been criticized for not getting good character development; many believe the author doesn’t care about them as much as others. It’s kind of hilarious when you think about it; this image is pretty solid indication of which characters Hussie does and doesn’t care about.

  • John goes without saying as the protagonist of the comic. Roxy as well since she’s such a popular character. The image clearly presents them as ringleaders with how they’re in front.
  • Rose and Kanaya are basically the number 1 ship in the comic in terms of being a thing so they kind of go without saying too.
  • Dave and Karkat are a controversial ship the comic loves shoving in our faces in really weird ways. But Hussie seems to think fans like that? Sure, the ship has some sort of crazy cult popularity, but to many people (myself included) it comes across as super forced.
  • And Dirk… Dirk is cool I guess? He isn’t paired up with anyone but it’s obvious Hussie cares about him enough to add him to the picture. It’s kind of amusing he’s just sort of there.

Oh wait another teaser just came out as I was about to publish this post but I’ll talk about it some other time. Here’s me hoping the upcoming Homestuck material is good.

Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 71: Rainbow Freefalls of Frivolous Banter

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Introduction

< Part 70 | Part 71 | Part 72 >

Act 6 Act 2, Part 6 of 6

Pages 4595-4666 (MSPA: 6495-6566)

Jack returns to kill Jane again but is interrupted by a message from DD:

Hang on. It’s this guy. Gotta answer this. He better be bearing news of murdered youngsters. 

He says the deceased child count is still sitting at zero over here. You say WHAT? He says that’s not all. You wait for him to spill the beans. 

He says one of the brats staged a little rebellion on the moon. Stuck the Brute’s head on a pike for all to see. Real black eye for the kingdom and the Condesce. Press is going nuts with it. Wait. The Brute’s dead, you say? He says yes. Dammit. He was one of your best agents. You never really cared for the guy but you admired his brutality. We all did sir, he says. 

It seems like the alpha kids are actually doing a good job going against the Derse agents, inadvertently or otherwise, since the agents’ plans are all ruined now. What’s especially crazy about this is that Jack Noir of all people is hopelessly struggling to accomplish anything.

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Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck Commentary Part 70: A Friendship Permanently Ruined

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Introduction

< Part 69 | Part 70 | Part 71 >

Act 6 Act 2, Part 5 of 6

Pages 4569-4594 (MSPA: 6469-6494)

Jane’s conversation with Dirk’s responder about Sburb (i.e. stuff that matters) looks like this:

but her conversation with Roxy about teen drama shit looks like this:

(click to zoom in)

I think this difference says a lot about the alpha kids’ story arc, and how much time they waste on stuff that isn’t Sburb. I don’t even have much to say about the short pesterlog, other than that Jane is noticeably enthusiastic about starting up the game and more than ready to begin, and I think her entering the game could’ve easily progressed smoothly from here on out.

However—and this is a tangent that isn’t so much saying stuff about the short pesterlog—I imagine the progression of events might be too straightforward if Jane didn’t start getting bugged by other people. In the beta kids’ arc, getting John into the game was an interesting storyline because it was our first time seeing that happen, not to mention we didn’t even know he would be transported to another dimension. In the trolls’ arc that stuff is all kind of fast forwarded through, while in the alpha kids’ arc it’s interrupted by relationship drama. I think the story probably would’ve progressed interestingly enough without that happening since plot twists regarding starting the game have already happened in the form of things blowing up. Then again I can kind of see why Jane entering would keep getting delayed like that. Act 6 Act 2 isn’t really in any position to conclude yet; for one thing we still haven’t heard from Jake at all in this act, let alone see him make progress on his bunny mission.

Anyway let’s get on with the long pesterlog.

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