< Part 42 | Part 43 | Part 44 >
Act 5 Act 2, Part 16 of 32
Pages 3321-3359 (MSPA: 5221-5259)
NOTE: Sorry the post’s two days late. So much for spring break giving me a faster schedule.
Up next is another walkaround, similar to Alterniabound but with a somewhat different, more worrisome tone. If you take a moment to examine the items scattered across the floor, there’s so much dramatic irony (thinking Vriska is harmless and Tavros is alive and well) and worries as to where everyone is, especially Gamzee.
(Kanaya, talk to Feferi and Sollux)
SOLLUX: al2o let’2 get real, thii2 horn piile ii2n’t comfortable at all, ii’ve got hard metal edge2 jabbiing me everywhere, and iit’2 lumpy a2 hell, and you can’t move a fuckiing iinch wiithout honkiing the 2hiit out of iit and makiing everyone iin the room look at you.
SOLLUX: what iidiiot thought thii2 wa2 the iideal thiing two chiill out on. oh that’2 riight, a braiindead clown who eat2 toxiic 2liime.
SOLLUX: you probably liike iit becau2e iit’2 liike a coral reef or 2ome horriible jagged underwater piile of 2hiit liike that.
FEFERI: GROUC)(Y MOT)(-ER GLUBB-ER.
FEFERI: ❤
Object piles are a recurring motif in Homestuck that doesn’t exactly make sense. And the comic knows that.
(Kanaya, talk to Karkat about Terezi)
KANAYA: What Was That About
KARKAT: I DON’T KNOW, I GUESS I FUCKED UP AGAIN.
KARKAT: I CAN’T SEEM TO DO ANYTHING RIGHT IN HER EYES ANYMORE.
KARKAT: I MEAN NOSE.
KANAYA: Maybe You Should Go Say Something To Her
KARKAT: WELL I WOULD, BUT SHE’S PROBABLY BURROWED FUCK DEEP IN THIS LAB BY NOW. I’M SURE SHE’S BUSY SCOOTING UP AND DOWN STAIRS AND SHOOSHING THROUGH POINTLESS CORRIDORS, AND OPENING CHESTS CONTAINING LIKE THREE BOONDOLLARS AND HIDEOUS PAINTINGS OF ENORMOUS NAKED BARNYARD MONSTERS.
KARKAT: WHAT IS WITH ALL THE CHESTS ANYWAY? AND WHY DO WE KEEP SQUIRRELING OUR USELESS SHIT AWAY IN THEM? I REALLY SHOULD HAVE WRITTEN A MEMO ABOUT THIS. LIKE, THE RULES OF CHESTIQUETTE.
This is like one of these moments in fiction where somebody points out that they aren’t in a work of fiction so they shouldn’t do [whatever]. Such moments are always pretty amusing. Except this time Karkat’s recognizing that the trolls are inexplicably doing stuff that’s pretty common in video games (in this case, chests full of random stuff).
(Kanaya, tell Karkat where you’re going)
KANAYA: Im Returning To The Core To Deposit The Matriorb
KANAYA: Wish Me Luck
KARKAT: WHOA WHAT THE FUCK???
KARKAT: I MEAN, THAT’S GREAT, IF THAT’S WHAT YOU WANT TO DO WITH IT. BUT YOU CAN’T GO, I NEED YOU HERE. LOOK AROUND, SHIT IS MAYHEM.
KANAYA: Ill Only Be Gone For A Few Minutes
KANAYA: Anyway Youre Doing A Good Job And I Think You Can Manage To Cope With My Momentary Absense
KARKAT: OK FINE.
KARKAT: IN THAT CASE
KARKAT: GOOD LUCK, HOPE IT WORKS.
KANAYA: Thanks
Here, Karkat is recognizing a flaw in Kanaya’s plan that I’ve seen readers point out: going to the core to deposit the matriorb isn’t ideal when everyone’s missing.
Also, Karkat is a REALLY worrisome guy. He doesn’t want Kanaya to leave the lab when half of his team is missing, one is presumed dead, and one just left.
(Karkat, talk to Kanaya about Jade)
KANAYA: Have You Found Her Password System To Be Practical
KARKAT: DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE PASSWORD BULLSHIT.
KARKAT: SO, OK. FUTURE JADE GIVES ME SOME REALLY MYSTERIOUS THING TO TELL PAST JADE, TO MAKE SURE SHE DOES SOMETHING SHE NEEDS TO DO WITHOUT EXPLICITLY GIVING HERSELF THE IDEA FROM THE FUTURE.
KARKAT: WHICH IS DUMB, BUT OK I GO ALONG WITH IT SO SHE DOESN’T COMPLETELY FLIP THE FUCK OUT AT ME. AND THEN I GET BACK TO HER IN THE FUTURE TO SAY I DID IT.
KARKAT: AND WHAT AM I GREETED WITH? PASSWORD.
KARKAT: PASSWORD PASSWORD PASSWORD PASSWORD PASSWORD PASSWORD. PASSWORD YOU NUBBY GRUMPY SACK OF UGLY FUCK. I WANT A PASSWORD RIGHT NOW OR I WILL DIRECT MY COLD LASER HATESTARE THROUGH YOUR BULGE FROM BEHIND MY GOOFY ASS GOGGLY GIRL GLASSES FOR LAME SHITTY SISSIES.
KARKAT: OK I’M PARAPHRASING HERE.
KARKAT: SO I GIVE HER THE PASSWORD AND SHE’S LIKE WRONG!!! I HAVEN’T GIVEN YOU THAT PASSWORD YET, OR YOU ALREADY GAVE ME THAT PASSWORD, OR IT’S TOO EARLY FOR IT OR WHATEVER. FIND THE RIGHT FUTURE ME TO GIVE THE PASSWORD TO.
KARKAT: SO I’M LIKE FUCK, I RESPECTFULLY SUBMIT THIS IS NEW LEVELS OF STUPIDITY AND POINTLESSNESS THAT ONLY RETARDS WOULD ENJOY WHILE EARNESTLY INVESTIGATING THEIR OWN GENITALS, BUT THAT’S JUST MY OPINION.
KARKAT: AND THEN WE SPEND WAY MORE TIME ARGUING ABOUT PASSWORD SHIT THAN ANYTHING CONSTRUCTIVE.
This whole thing Karkat’s describing really is pretty confusing. Karkat thinks the password system is incredibly stupid and confusing, but here’s what’s actually stupid and confusing: the trolls jumping around the kids’ timeline instead of just going linear like a sensible person.
KANAYA: Do You Think Terezi Is Aware Of Your Interactions With Her
KARKAT: I DON’T KNOW, PROBABLY?
KANAYA: I Dont Want To Sound Too Meddlesome Because I Know People Dont Like That Much But Didnt You And She Used To Have A Thing Like That
KARKAT: MAN, WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK WE HAD A THING???
KANAYA: Well Didnt You
KARKAT: THE THING WHICH MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE EXISTED NOTWITHSTANDING, WHAT RIGHT WOULD SHE HAVE TO BE UPSET ABOUT ME TALKING TO JADE.
KANAYA: Maybe She Thinks You Are Trying To Make Her Jealous
KARKAT: OH LIKE SHE’S NOT DOING THE SAME THING TO ME BY TALKING TO THAT POMPOUS TOOL WHO’S IDIOTICALLY INSECURE ABOUT THE COLOR OF HIS EYES.
KARKAT: WHILE HYPOCRITICALLY TYPING WITH HIS CANDY RED TEXT TO DRIVE THE GIRLS WILD, WHAT A FUCKING SHOWOFF.
First off, why does everyone think Karkat and Terezi were a thing? It’s not like they exchanged heart smileys or had a vaguely described “little moment” that Karkat is super embarrassed to talk about or anything.
Second, this conversation demonstrates Karkat and Terezi falling apart thanks to the human kids. I’ve said this several times, but what the fuck is it with trolls hitting on humans from another goddamn universe that they can only message through chat client and spy on through a digital viewport? I didn’t realize that the trolls hitting on humans thing is so strong that it’s interfering with existing relationships. I know this thing is played mostly for laughs (and shipping) but seriously, it has some pretty disturbing implications regarding the trolls.
(Karkat, talk to Feferi and Sollux)
KARKAT: HAVE ANY OF YOU SEEN GAMZEE?
KARKAT: IT’S NOT LIKE HIM TO STRAY FAR FROM THE HORN PILE.
KARKAT: I’M GETTING KIND OF WORRIED.
FEFERI: You are?
FEFERI: Aw, t)(at’s so sweet!
SOLLUX: ehehehheheheheheh, yeah.
KARKAT: AUGH.
Karkat is a really easy guy to make fun of. Both his angry side and his incredibly paranoid side. This is what makes him such a weirdly endearing figure.
Also, there’s special emphasis on the fact that Gamzee’s gone missing, even though five other trolls are also nowhere to be found to the knowledge of everyone in the lab. I suppose that’s either because Karkat inwardly has a degree of special affection for him or because his whereabouts are especially uncertain. Probably both things.
KARKAT: JUST, WHERE IS HE?
SOLLUX: ii dunno man, ii have heard nary a honk out of hiim for a whiile.
FEFERI: Maybe somet)(ing frig)(tened )(im off into t)(e lab?
FEFERI: W)(y don’t you go looking for )(im? We could )(elp!
KARKAT: I WOULD, BUT
KARKAT: I CAN’T. GOT TO STAY PUT, KEEP THE TEAM TOGETHER.
KARKAT: I DON’T WANT YOU FUCKERS STRAYING OFF EITHER, YOU UNDERSTAND?
KARKAT: JUST STAY IN THE PILE AND KEEP MAKING EVERYONE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH YOUR SAPPY BULLSHIT, THAT’S AN ORDER.
Karkat would rather keep the ones he is still in touch with here than look for Gamzee and risk more falling apart. I guess this demonstrates how desperate he is to keep everyone in track.
So you then go back to being Kanaya, transportalize out of the lab, when all of a sudden…
Apparently Eridan knocking Kanaya off the transportalizer caused the matriorb to fall out of her sylladex?
(Eridan, talk to Kanaya)
ERIDAN: kan i been meanin to thank you
KANAYA: For What
ERIDAN: for all that trainin you did
ERIDAN: i wwouldnt be the incredible holy wwizard i am noww wwithout your help
KANAYA: But I Didnt Even Really Train You I Just Made You A Wand
ERIDAN: yeah wwell thats all i needed i guess
ERIDAN: i just needed for someone to showw a little faith in me so im sayin thanks i owwe ya
KANAYA: Okay Then Youre Welcome
KANAYA: I Hope You Use Your Magnificent Powers Of Light And Hope For Goodness And Purity And Lets Not Forget Science
ERIDAN: dont wworry im all ovver that shit you dont evven knoww
KANAYA: Uh Oh I Hope That Didnt Come Off As Too Sarcastic
Kanaya says she made Eridan his new wand just to shut him up. But now he’s seriously into that wand, thanking her and everything. Of course, the wand turns out to be a big mistake but I’ll talk about that soon.
ERIDAN: hey wwhat are you doin anywway
ERIDAN: wwhats that thing there
KANAYA: The Matriorb
KANAYA: I Was About To Go Hatch It In The Core To Restore Our Race
ERIDAN: that sounds
ERIDAN: hopeful
KANAYA: I Hope Its Hopeful
ERIDAN: you should of told me about this
ERIDAN: if theres goin to be any sort a hope for our race as the prince of hope i demand to be invvolvved
ERIDAN: so dont go anywwhere wwithout me got it
KANAYA: But
KANAYA: Fine
Here Kanaya’s reluctantly agreeing to do what Eridan wants. This brings to mind how Rose consistently refuses what people tell her to do, while Kanaya has the opposite problem: doing what others beg her to do so they’ll shut up. She and Rose have a lot more differences than one may realize.
(Eridan, talk to Karkat)
As I said in one of my Hivebent posts, Eridan’s conversation with Karkat in this walkaround reveals a lot about his character. I’ll go through it in somewhat more depth, also because it’s fairly long.
ERIDAN: nobody gets it
ERIDAN: i had a harder time than anybody wwith this game
ERIDAN: it wwas really fuckin unfair wwhat challenges i got saddled wwith
ERIDAN: i wwoulda fuckin MURDERED for a land full of a lot a harmless brains and fire
ERIDAN: but no
ERIDAN: it wwas so lonely
ERIDAN: hey guys anybody wwant to come hang out wwith me in the land a wwrath and angels
The last line above is the reveal of the name of Eridan’s planet. His is the only one whose name isn’t revealed in the trolls’ arc; his and Gamzee’s are also the only god tier titles not revealed back then either. Gamzee’s god tier title wasn’t revealed in the trolls’ arc for a good reason: it would have foreshadowed too blatantly that he will become evil. When his title is first referenced, only half of it is revealed, more subtly hinting that he’ll become evil; subtle foreshadowing is really fun to catch, especially while rereading. But as for Eridan’s title and planet, I’m not really sure why they were revealed so late.
ERIDAN: anybody at all i knoww it isnt anythin like one of your flippin land picnics
ERIDAN: anybody please ill evven settle for the kittycat shipper cavve girl
Eridan refers to Nepeta as the “kittycat shipper cave girl”. This implies he doesn’t even know her name. Make of that what you will.
ERIDAN: but yeah i guess bein her servver player and savvin her life wwasnt goddamn enough
ERIDAN: had to be my most humiliatin rejection yet
KARKAT: OK, BUT TO BE FAIR, I’M PRETTY SURE SHE’S STILL OBSESSED WITH ME.
KARKAT: IT’S A VERY UNFORTUNATE, VERY RED AND VERY UNREQUITED SITUATION I’VE BEEN TRYING TO TIPTOE AROUND FOR A LONG TIME, OK?
KARKAT: HER DISINTEREST IN YOUR ADVANCE WASN’T A REFLECTION ON YOU AT ALL.
KARKAT: COME ON, WE TALKED ABOUT THIS.
ERIDAN: yeah i guess
KARKAT: ANYWAY I DON’T KNOW HOW YOU WERE EXPECTING TO MAKE ANY SORT OF TRACTION IF YOU SEE HER AS THE KITTYCAT SHIPPER GIRL, SHE’S A PERSON WITH FEELINGS YOU RAVING DOUCHE.
Nepeta’s thing for Karkat is a bit of a romantic tragedy. She is into a guy who is fascinated by troll romance just like she is. She’s afraid to tell him how she feels, but he knows and isn’t into her. Then she fucking dies. Not long ago it was brought up again, though I doubt Karkat would be into his old paramour combined with whatever the fuck is up with him and Dave (sigh) aside from perhaps some sympathy? I’m not sure.
ERIDAN: i knoww kar its not evven the point im ovver that embarrassment
ERIDAN: im just saying wwhere the fuck wwere you guys
ERIDAN: i had to deal wwith those awwful angels all by my self
ERIDAN: do you havve any idea howw hard those assholes are to kill
ERIDAN: like at least a minute of sustained fire from only the most legendary wweapon evver and they wwere FAST and ANGRY as SHIT
KARKAT: YEAH WE TALKED ABOUT THAT TOO.
KARKAT: I REALLY DON’T THINK YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE KILLING THEM DUDE.
KARKAT: I KEPT SAYING, I THINK THEY’RE LIKE GAME CONSTRUCTS OR SOMETHING. THERE TO SERVE SOME OTHER GAME PURPOSE, NOT FOR YOU TO HUNT DOWN.
KARKAT: THEY DIDN’T EVEN GIVE YOU ANY GRIST, YOU IDIOT. THAT WAS YOUR FIRST CLUE.
Here we learn that Eridan spent most of his time along killing angels he wasn’t supposed to be killing. I’ve seen people suggest that maybe the angels were predestined to be killed all along to challenge Eridan and prepare him for the ultimate battle. Although this is possible, his dancestor Cronus was mentioned to have learned from “angels” about Lord English which perhaps suggests otherwise. Also, Karkat has a point when he says the angels didn’t drop grist. Who even knows?
ERIDAN: fine wwhatevver your still missin the point
ERIDAN: wwhere wwas evverybody wwhy are they avvoidin me all the time
KARKAT: THEY WERE TOO SCARED SHITLESS TO SET FOOT ON YOUR PLANET FOR MORE THAN A SECOND!
KARKAT: BETWEEN A TRIGGERHAPPY PRINCE WITH A GOD WEAPON BLASTING ANYTHING THAT TWITCHED AND A MILLION CRAZED ANGELS HE DELIBERATELY ENRAGED, IT WASN’T WHAT I’D CALL AN IDEAL SOCIAL HUB.
KARKAT: IF YOU WERE LONELY WHY DIDN’T YOU VENTURE OUT MORE OFTEN?
ERIDAN: wwell i wwoulda but nobody else wwas vvolunteerin to pick up the slack on angel killin duties
KARKAT: OH MY FUCKING GOD WHY DON’T YOU LISTEN
Eridan still thinks the angels were meant to be killed instead of listening to what Karkat kept telling him, even just now. That kind of reminds me of Vriska; earlier I’ve talked about how Eridan’s attitude is somewhat comparable with Vriska’s.
ERIDAN: and anywways i did leavve
ERIDAN: evventually
KARKAT: LEAVING YOUR PLANET TO GO DUEL WITH SOLLUX ISN’T BEING SOCIABLE YOU THICK FUCK.
KARKAT: AND YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU DESERVED GETTING YOUR ASS HANDED TO YOU, BECAUSE I WARNED YOU AND YOU DIDN’T LISTEN.
This conversation heavily suggests Eridan is antisocial. If he wasn’t such a jackass he’d be exactly the kind of guy you’d feel bad for. Though some readers do sympathize with him. His morality is still an occasional debate topic, though not as common as Vriska’s.
(Eridan, talk to Feferi and Sollux)
SOLLUX: oh GOD, iit’2 hiim.
SOLLUX: ff can you tell hiim two go away, ii don’t even have the energy for thii2.
ERIDAN: hey finless this doesnt concern those wwith mustard sludge slippin through their vveins
ERIDAN: its a matter for royalty only
ERIDAN: so keep your mouth closed or ill slit you open ovver my next meal
SOLLUX: w/e bro, not iintere2ted.
This dude really is shown to us as the friend nobody likes.
FEFERI: -Eridan, please! I don’t want to see any more dueling.
FEFERI: Don’t try to provoke )(im. It’s not like I don’t know w)(at you’re doing! You keep trying to spark a rivalry wit)( )(im to get me to auspisticize between you two, and pull us out of our quadrant!
FEFERI: It is t)(e oldest and lamest trick in t)(e book. It didn’t work t)(en and it won’t work now!
ERIDAN: thats an astonishin accusation howw could you say that
ERIDAN: first as if this scum is evven wworthy of a rivvalry wwith me and second as if im not totally DONE wwith you like i havve TOLD you REPEATEDLY
ERIDAN: all i wwant to do is havve a wword wwith you
FEFERI: Ok -Eridan, we can talk. But only if you’re planning on being civil.
ERIDAN: thats wwhat you nevver got fef
ERIDAN: you and i are bein civvil by vvery vvirtue a the fact that wwere talkin noww
ERIDAN: wwere royalty you and i and wwe belong together
ERIDAN: evven if not in THAT WWAY wwhich i get that youre not into and thats fine
ERIDAN: but wwe belong together as the rulin class if nothin else
ERIDAN: so im gonna ask you this one last time and givve you the choice
ERIDAN: im about to go please come wwith me
1. Eridan thinks he and Feferi are being civil by nature thanks to their blood colors. Even before the world ended only a few of the twelve trolls took the blood caste system seriously at all. Arguably none of the trolls even are in social castes anymore.
2. He says it’s fine that Feferi isn’t into him. This is kind of an important thing to note; from what I can tell many fans portray him as just plain obsessed with Feferi.
FEFERI: Jack Noir is INSAN-ELY powerful -Eridan! Please, I don’t want to see you do anyt)(ing foolis)( by trying to fig)(t )(im.
ERIDAN: fight him
ERIDAN: are you fuckin nuts
ERIDAN: i slaughtered enough angels to knoww my limits and wwhere i stand against the lord of all angels they prophecized
ERIDAN: of course im not gonna fight him i stand no chance in hell against that guy
ERIDAN: im goin to join him
FEFERI: YOU’R-E W)(AT???
ERIDAN: and youre gonna join me in joinin him too fef come on lets go
SOLLUX: AHAHAHAHA, ok that’2 iit, he’2 lo2t iit.
FEFERI: NO I AM NOT! And you aren’t eit)(er! T)(at is GLUBBING INSAN-E!
FEFERI: I t)(oug)(t you were supposed to be t)(e Prince of )(ope? )(ow is it )(opeful to surrender to a murderous demon like a COWARD???
ERIDAN: as the prince of hope im uniquely qualified to recognize wwhen all hope is lost
ERIDAN: and im tellin you there is no hope not evven a little bit
ERIDAN: only thing left to do is servve him and hope he spares us
ERIDAN: and im extendin the invvitation to come wwith me cause evven though you dont think so i really do care about you
Joining a villain? As dumb as it is, it would have been pretty interesting to see Eridan officially join Jack all on his own. I can’t help but compare this to Vriska’s whole plan of creating Jack and then killing him. Both are ridiculous ideas that one could argue make the troll who wants to deal with Jack this way a villain by association. And Eridan at this point arguably just became a villain.
ERIDAN: servvin under jack together wwell be unstoppable and our anemones wwill tremble before us wwhat do you say
FEFERI: NO. You )(ave lost ALL RIG)(T to use fis)( puns FOR-EV-ER. I revoke your fis)( punning license, as w)(ale as our fronds)(ip!
ERIDAN: dont take that tuna vvoice wwith me princess
FEFERI: W)(AT T)(-E FUCK DID I JUST SAY???
FEFERI: T)(at’s it. T)(is makes me sad, -Eridan, but now we )(ave to stop you. We can’t let you find Jack and risk you leading )(im to us.
ERIDAN: so thats howw it is is it
SOLLUX: 2he’2 riight, man. can’t beliieve thii2, ii wa2 lookiing forward two a nap two.
SOLLUX: ii 2hould have kiilled you on lobaf when ii had the chance.
SOLLUX: oh well, gue22 iit’2 only fiittiing ii’d take you down iin ROUND TWO.
SOLLUX: you ready, priince?
ERIDAN: bring it mage
This once again resembles Tavros planning to stop Vriska from doing more evil deeds. And this time it directly leads to a second duel between Sollux and Eridan.
The video game-style sequence that concludes the walkaround is a badass start, but what comes next is a huge shock.
I like how the picture shows Sollux’s eye beam powers fizzling out.
The wand turns out to be an incredibly deadly weapon that does this to Sollux:
Note the impact crater in the wall. God damn do trolls have sturdy bodies. It probably should’ve left a bigger splash of blood, probably a smaller impact crater, and killed him, but I guess trolls are different. Tavros merely lost the use of his legs when Vriska jumped him off a cliff.
But even that’s just the beginning.
This whole sequence uses the trolls’ blood colors a lot.
There goes Feferi. There’s a lot of irony in her death (and many other deaths in Homestuck). Eridan always had feelings for her and said just a minute ago that he does indeed care about her. But when she attacked him I guess his murder instincts kicked in for real after having been so long a gag (“haha he wants to kill all the land dwellers what a pretentious douche”). That’s not all though: Eridan always wanted to kill all the land dwellers, but the only troll he successfully killed (on-screen at least) was a sea dweller and his beloved ex-moirail.
Up next Eridan and Kanaya face off and he destroys the matriorb. Why would he do that?! He murdered Feferi in a fit of self-defense (just like how Vriska killed Tavros), but why destroy the orb? Is it to signify he’s now officially a villain? Now that I think of it that likely is why.
Kanaya is next in the line of people ready to attack Eridan. But this happens:
Another death that’s ironic on multiple levels. Kanaya got killed with a weapon she made as a joke. Not only that, Eridan killed the one landdweller he didn’t want to kill, who he respected because she listened to his nagging. This death doesn’t actually stick but it’s the one that really strikes hard in this whole thing, as a respectable character given a good amount of attention by the story.
But when you scroll down from this death scene, the traumatic death of a much-loved character is immediately broken by a Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff reference which is probably the single thing that made me laugh hardest in my first read (and made me laugh just as hard in my second read):
Let’s Read Homestuck sadly omitted this gag, I guess because they thought it was inappropriately placed humor.
A common criticism of Homestuck is that sad scenes are too often intertwined with humor. Feferi’s death, too, was subject to this when her body landed on a pile of silly honk horns. Hussie has something of a policy of keeping a degree of humor in sad scenes for the most part (though some sad scenes are indeed played straight, like Jade’s letter to John or Rose’s death following Game Over); he has a bit of a thing for dark humor, which also seems to be present in his older works given what I’ve heard of them. Many people don’t like this whole insistence, though I think the sadness of such scenes usually adequately outweighs any little jokes. And when the jokes aren’t outweighed (as is the case here), they’re just too hilarious to stay mad at.
Eridan leaves the lab and Karkat stares in shock, making one of the most famous Karkat faces in the whole comic. It’s another one of the four different Karkat pictures I’ve had as a profile picture on websites.
It’s often considered a mystery why Eridan spared Karkat, but I think it’s pretty clear why: he injured Sollux and killed Feferi and Kanaya because they all attacked him with intent to kill. Karkat didn’t attack him, merely standing there in shock the whole time too afraid to do anything.
Karkat examines the bodies around the room and has a brief exchange with Doc Scratch.
Mr. Vantas.
GA: WHAT THE FUCK?
GA: WHO ARE YOU, AND WHY ARE YOU MESSAGING ME THROUGH KANAYA’S ACCOUNT?
GA: I SERIOUSLY DON’T NEED THIS SHIT RIGHT NOW.
I’m delivering this message through the console of one of my numerous unwitting proteges to give you a word of advice, and then you will not hear from me again.
Karkat apparently doesn’t know who Doc Scratch is. This implies Scratch only manipulated some of the trolls. He seems to have mostly toyed with girls rather than boys, so I would assume that may be why. But then again, not long ago Kanaya talked about how she learned that Scratch has been manipulating her friends so it would make sense that all the trolls are aware of him. But really, who knows?
Also, here’s something I realized: Doc Scratch hardly ever refers to people by their names, a trait he shares with Caliborn.
An ominous, foreboding line alright. It not only heightens the tension of the scene and adds suspense, but also is one of those bits that clues readers in to the idea that Kanaya will come back as a vampire.
Kanaya’s resurrection is one of those moments that’s deliberately given plenty of hints before it happens. As I said last post, some moments are foreshadowed very strongly to throw readers a bone. I’ve seen readers both quickly catch on to the clues that Kanaya is up and about and readers refuse to believe she really is a vampire because that would be ridiculous.
Karkat turns around, pretending not to be nervous as the narration states, and in typical subversive Homestuck style, all the bodies are still there. He finally gets in touch with Gamzee once more.
TC: honk.
CG: GAMZEE!!!
CG: FUCK
CG: THERE YOU ARE, YOU HAD ME WORRIED DUDE
Gamzee isn’t using his normal typing quirk. Subtle clues that something’s going wrong.
TC: HONK.
CG: UH
CG: YEAH
CG: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ANYWAY, I TOLD EVERYONE TO LET ME KNOW IF YOU’RE GONNA WANDER OFF.
TC: honk.
TC: HONK.
TC: honk.
TC: HONK.
CG: YEAH, I GET IT WISE GUY, YOU’RE A FUCKING CLOWN, WHO CARES.
CG: QUIT THE BULLSHIT PARTYCLOWN ANTICS AND GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE.
CG: THE SHIT HAS HIT THE WHIRLING DEVICE, AND YOU COULD BE IN SERIOUS DANGER OUT THERE.
This whole conversation is pretty much about gradually becoming more and more scary. First stage: Gamzee strangely isn’t alternating caps. Second stage: Gamzee is saying nothing but quiet and loud honks.
TC: shut up.
CG: WHAT…
TC: I SAID SHUT THE MOTHERFUCK UP, MOTHERFUCKER.
TC: honk honk honk :o)
CG: DUDE
CG: ARE YOU OK
CG: YOU’RE REALLY WEIRDING ME OUT.
TC: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
TC: uh, yeah…
TC: I GUESS I’M ALL MOTHERFUCKIN WEIRDING OUT AT SOME EXTENT TO MY OWN MOTHERFUCKIN SELF.
TC: but it’s all good, i’m chill with it.
Stage three: Gamzee says “shut up”, something his old self would never say. Stage four: he went crazy.
CG: OH GOD
CG: NO NO NO, PLEASE DON’T TELL ME YOU WENT CRAZY, I COULDN’T TAKE THAT ON TOP OF ALL THIS.
TC: ON TOP OF MOTHERFUCKIN WHAT, MOTHERFUCKER.
CG: ERIDAN JUST FLIPPED HIS SHIT AND KILLED FEFERI AND KANAYA, AND I’M FREAKING THE FUCK OUT ABOUT IT.
TC: heh heh.
CG: HEH HEH???
CG: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?
CG: SERIOUSLY, GET BACK HERE NOW, AND HAVE A SLIME PIE TO RELAX OR SOMETHING.
TC: SLIME?
TC: there is no more slime, brother.
TC: AND ANYWAY.
TC: shit was motherfuckin poison, didn’t you know?
CG: UH…
CG: NO? I MEAN, I WOULD NEVER EAT IT, BUT
TC: THEN GET MOTHERFUCKIN SCHOOLFED ALL ABOUT THE WICKED NEWS, PUNCHLINE BLOODED MOTHERFUCKER.
Evil Gamzee is disturbing in every way imaginable. Not just in that he’s sly and murderous and loves playing with corpses, but he retains his old self’s calm attitude, reminding us further that this guy is the same guy who was always super calm no matter which annoying weirdo he was talking to.
Also, there’s some other smaller weirdnesses about the way Gamzee’s acting. Aside from apparently finding the traumatic deaths Karkat witnessed funny and realizing his slime was poison, he calls Karkat a “punchline blooded motherfucker”. This tells us that he now is one of those douchey trolls who actually gives a shit about the blood caste system. That line isn’t quite as blatant of a cue that he’s evil now, but it tells us that just as well. Previously he considered the blood color system to just be confusing nonsense, so now I guess losing his slime drugs brought to him his internal purple-blooded caste superiority.
TC: i’ve been kicking the wicked ignorance on this shit.
TC: BEEN MOTHERFUCKIN SLAUGHTERING THE WICKED IGNORANCE, BRO.
TC: all up in lifelong denial about my calling.
TC: AS A DESCENDANT OF THE HIGH MOTHERFUCKIN SUBJUGGLATORS.
TC: we are higher than you, brother.
TC: WE ARE HIGHER THAN MOTHERFUCKIN EVERYBODY.
TC: honk.
CG: GAMZEE
CG: PLEASE NO
TC: and now i’m the last one, so i finally motherfuckin understand.
TC: I FINALLY GOT MY MOTHERFUCKING UNDERSTAND ON TO WHO THE MIRTHFUL MESSIAHS ARE.
TC: they were always both me. :o)
TC: AND ALSO MOTHERFUCKING ME. Do:
Here, Gamzee’s saying that he’s finally come to true understanding about his clown religion. His high-held religious idols turned out to be himself. In other words, he turned out to be his own god. Literal self-worship.
Now that I think of it, despite the blatant juggalo impression Gamzee gives humans, ICP is as nowhere near why he worships this ridiculous clown bullshit. His own connections to Lord English is why; ICP is merely a byproduct of his existence.
TC: and now.
TC: AND MOTHERFUCKING NOW.
TC: i am going to motherfuckin kill all you motherfuckers.
CG: OH GOD
CG: OH MAN
CG: OH GOD
TC: I AM GOING TO MOTHERFUCKING KILL ALL YOU MOTHERFUCKERS.
TC: and paint the wicked pictures with your motherfuckin blood.
TC: FROM YOUR VEINS WILL DRIP MY MIRACLES.
TC: your crushed bones will make my special stardust.
TC: WELCOME TO THE DARK CARNIVAL, BROTHER.
TC: honk.
TC: HONK.
TC: honk.
TC: HOOOOOOOOOOONK.
Nothing says turning evil like openly planning to kill all your friends. Also, Karkat’s descended into “OH GOD NO NO NO NO NO” mode.
This is one of those pictures which mirrors the reader’s reaction to stuff.
The pesterlog’s over so now I guess it’s time to process Gamzee turning evil.
To put it bluntly, the spacey juggalo troll who was never mad at anything is now officially an antagonist. While most of the other secondary trolls are killed off, Gamzee is turned into a villain. Here’s what I said about Gamzee turning evil in my whole character summary paragraph thing I did in my Act 5 Act 1 posts:
It’s interesting how Hussie chose to make this troll be the one who flips upside-down and turns into a murderous psychopath. Out of the trolls, Gamzee was enough of a secondary character to safely sacrifice to antagonist land. He didn’t do much to the plot at this point, and he didn’t already have traits of a potential antagonist like Vriska or Eridan did. This makes his turning evil an exceptionally shocking twist.
I think that paragraph speaks for itself. While Vriska and Eridan, who also participated in the troll bloodbath, already had antagonistic traits, Gamzee turning evil adds much more to the mix of horror, perhaps the most out of this whole arc.
A bit later would be a better stopping point but this post is getting long so I’ll end here. See you next time as we go through even more bizarre semi-comedic horror movie stuff.
Cookie Fonster's stuff 
