Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 103: Mobster Reformation with Additional Throwbacks

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Introduction

< Part 102 | Part 103 | Part 104 >

Pages 6111-6242 (I think I’m going to stop listing the MSPA page numbers, just makes it more cluttered and I already forgot to do so the last few posts)

Act 6 Intermission 5, Part 5 of 5

John’s triumphant face represents me finishing my posts for part 3 of Homestuck.

I’m officially putting my Homestuck post series back in the swing of things once again! The reason why has to do with two circumstances: (1) the coronavirus pandemic that’s affecting the entire world and causing so much to go on lockdown and forcing everyone to be homest-*gets shot* and (2) me finishing a musical project and getting burnt out on making musical stuff, which led me to get back into this project that isn’t about making music. The first 40% or so of this post I wrote back in January of this year, but the rest I wrote just yesterday over the course of a few hours because I was kind of bored. Right now I’m in an extended spring break, and the rest of this spring semester will be all online classes which is still difficult for me to even process.

Anyway, now that I’m done with Part 3 of Homestuck (A6A1 to A6I5), I’m going to roughly list out my plans for Part 4 of Homestuck:

  • A6A6A1: 1 post
  • A6A6I1: 5 posts
  • A6A6A2: 1 post
  • A6A6I2: 4 posts
  • most of the rest of A6A6: up in the air
  • [S] Collide and following pages: 1 post
  • Act 7 and credits: 1 post

I’ll also go ahead and confess that I’m really, really looking forward to covering a certain part of A6A6I1 that introduces us to a certain token heterosexual romance (John/Roxy if it wasn’t obvious). I’m very glad I didn’t get to that part before the epilogues dropped.

I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE.

Act 6 Intermission 5 Intermission 5 starts off with a humorous callback to a memorable scene from the Midnight Crew intermission, where Hearts Boxcars was swamped with clones of Eggs and Biscuits (which is how he ended up spending the majority of the intermission). It’s also a humorous way to demonstrate Caliborn’s ever-changing names for the Felt’s species.

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Random blog update

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  • WordPress is still dreadfully buggy and annoying to use
  • This semester is still an insane workload and I’ve dedicated my remaining creative energy to music stuff
  • Homestuck^2 so far is absolute garbage and I hate even acknowledging that it exists
  • Sonic Robo Blast 2 v2.2 is the actual best thing ever and if you haven’t played it yet you’re really missing out

Also, I’ve been sitting on my next mainline Homestuck post (part 103) which has been unfinished for over a month now. I doubt I’ll get this post series back into the swing of things until May at the very earliest, unfortunately. Know that despite this current burnout, I probably always will love Homestuck to death.

In the mean time, I’ll go ahead and post an underappreciated track (click the link) made for the SiIvaGunner: King for Another Day Tournament, a giant musical project that was arguably the most fun I had doing anything ever.

Update on slow posting schedule

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Trust me, I won’t let my promise of having a faster Homestuck post schedule in 2020 go unfulfilled. I really should have mentioned sooner on this blog that my laptop hasn’t been in good condition since last September, which is a big part of why my posts were released so slowly in the last few months of the year. Now I’ve finally gotten around to ordering a new laptop, which should arrive a few days from now. My posts will most definitely be faster, for real, and I mean it this time, when the new computer happens.

Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 102: The Great Metafictional Nostalgia Trip

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Introduction

< Part 101 | Part 102 | Part 103 >

Pages 6055-6110

Act 6 Intermission 5, Part 4 of 5 (probably not 6)

I’ll only split Act 6 Intermission 5 into six parts if I feel I absolutely have to, like if the next post becomes insanely huge. Really don’t want to ruin my Pitbull pun from my last post.

This is my first Homestuck post of 2020!!! As I’ve said on Twitter, I intend on releasing posts regularly (on my usual once to twice a week basis) throughout at least the first half of the year, and boy am I excited to get back in the swing of things. I’ve estimated that I’ll reach Caliborn’s Masterpiece (a significant landmark point) in May or June, which means I’ll be able to make lots of progress on my Homestuck posts this year. And if I get bored of those, maybe I’ll even resume my rewritten post series.

KANAYA: …
KANAYA: …
KANAYA: …
KANAYA: …
KANAYA: …

Picking up from where we left off, we’re about to see what everyone’s favorite lesbian couple is up to in the meteor.

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Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 101: Faygo Degradation and Chair Tantrums

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Introduction

< Part 100 | Part 101 | Part 102 >

Pages 6015-6054

Act 6 Intermission 5, Part 3 of 5 (not to be confused with Mr. 305)

My Homestuck blog post series officially has a Pitbull reference now. I have no idea why I just did that.

The first thing we see when we check back in on the meteor crew is THIS horrifying panel. Terezi reveals that her eyes are regular seeing troll eyes once more, which is an image that feels INCREDIBLY wrong, and rightfully so. Her eyes are pulsing red as if she isn’t used to not wearing her dragon hood, her mouth is in a weird frown, and there are heavy bags under her eyes that tell us what shape Terezi is in right now.

Karkat’s facial expression tells us more than words ever could. Sometimes the guy just mirrors readers’ reactions to story events SO WELL.

This panel, man. Terezi is surrounded by these horrible bottles of Faygo and clown horns, but she’s still carrying a scalemate plush to remind us that she’s the same Terezi Pyrope we’ve followed since Act 4.

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Homestuck post 101 coming in the next few days!

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I’m on a trip to California right now until the 31st (immediately followed by MAGFest 2020 as I’ve mentioned before), and though I don’t normally write blog posts while on vacation, I was already over halfway through my 101st Homestuck post so I’ve decided I will finish that post during vacation. Right now I only have a few pages left to cover so you should expect that post to come at most a few days from now! It’ll probably be my last Homestuck post of 2019.

Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 100: Antagonist Origination Station

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Introduction

< Part 99 | Part 100 | Part 101 >

Pages 5947-6014

Act 6 Intermission 5, Part 2 of 5

Imagine a gigantic balloon shaped like the number 100 filling your screen right now.

Well, I did it. After four long years, I’ve reached the 100th installment of my Homestuck post series (which will hopefully not be my last Homestuck post of 2019) on the first anniversary of this post series’ resurrection. I worked on this post sort of on and off over the course of a month, because I know well that with my Homestuck posts I’m either absurdly fast or absurdly slow. I’m rather pleased with what material my 100th post turned out to cover: Aranea’s explanation of Lord English’s backstory, a villain we’ve known about since the Midnight Crew intermission.

I must say, having these posts’ numbers in the triple digits now is really goddamn weird. It now officially feels like this is a project I’ve gotten way too carried away with—not that it didn’t before, but this is just the nail in the coffin for me getting carried away. If I keep doing about 50 pages per post, this means that I’ll reach the end of Homestuck around post 140; realistically, probably quite a few more posts than that. The end of Homestuck won’t be the end of this post series though—I will continue with the epilogues, and IF IT BECOMES ACTUALLY GOOD, Homestuck^2 as well. Again speaking realistically, I estimate that I will reach the end of Homestuck in these posts in early 2021, which is a weird date to consider, almost like I’m a Hollywood studio announcing the release date for a movie or something. In any case, 100 posts is one HELL of a milestone.

POST-COMPLETION UPDATE: After reaching the end of Homestuck, I no longer have plans to make blog posts going through the epilogues—no not out of dislike for the epilogues, but rather because I feel like I’ve already said everything I wanted to about them in other posts. Also, Homestuck^2 never happened.

… Alright, let’s stop rambling and get on with Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 100!!!

A fitting image for my 100th post if I say so myself.

Act 6 Intermission 5 Intermission 2 is immediately followed by a scene showing us what John is up to. He’s sleeping on the couch, dreaming in a bubble amidst the cracks in paradox space formed by Lord English to complete an enormous circle of stupidity, which I mean both literally and figuratively. This image humorously calls back to Caliborn’s approximation of a circle with a mess of lines, showing that some things about him just never change.

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Pausing blog posts for two weeks or so

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I’m afraid Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 100, my post series’ fabled (under a very broad definition of “fabled”) entry into the triple digits, will have to wait a bit longer than I initially thought—probably not until mid-December or so. There’s two reasons for that:

(1) Finals are approaching which is always very busy, but usually not busy enough to pause blog posts were it not for:

(2) The SiIvaGunner: King for Another Day Tournament, which I will be putting most of my creative energy into making music for over the next few weeks. Regardless of your opinion on a YouTube channel best known for putting memes into video game music, I highly recommend taking the time to check out some of the musical arrangements that are being posted to the channel as we speak!!! There’s been some incredibly killer tunes so far and there will be MANY more to come.

There will be a rather short window of time in December when I’m likely to have the energy to make blog posts: roughly from 12/10 to 12/17, where I’ll probably fine myself bored one day and crank out a lot of blog posts just like my Homestuck post series’ grand resurrection last year. I will be going on vacation from 12/18 to 12/31, then to MAGFest 2020 from 1/1 to 1/5. After that, I suppose we’ll see what happens.

Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 99: 3*(2+50)weekium Meteor Mindfuckery

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Introduction

< Part 98 | Part 99 | Part 100 > (I’m close to a big milestone!!!)

Pages 5927-5946 (MSPA: 7827-7846)

Act 6 Intermission 5, Part 1 of 5

Man, “The Trolls” just aren’t what they used to be.

A few months ago when I looked over the titles of my old 2015-16 posts, I realized that “3*(2+50)weekium Meteor Mindfuckery” would have been a much better name for the post titled “Karkat Freakouts Ad Infinitum”, the post covering the beginning of the meteor journey. I’ve decided to use that title (which matches “Triennium Battleship Mindfuckery” for the start of the battleship journey) for the post that starts the tail end of the meteor journey, because I like that title a lot.

Act 6 Intermission 5 begins with a shot of the trolls’ meteor approaching its destination, corresponding with the battleship’s arrival at the end of the prior sub-act. It is accompanied with Karkat saying “DAVE ARE YOU THERE”, which is a fun way to start this intermission: pretty much any conversation between Karkat and Dave is guaranteed to be hilarious, and Karkat’s line indicates that they’ve grown quite a bit closer than they were last time we saw them.

Goofy alchemized computers are one of the few traditions from the early acts to survive this long, which I am very grateful for. I love the design of Karkat’s little crab watch thing.

KARKAT: ANSWER ME YOU JACKOFF.
KARKAT: DON’T BE ALL LIKE YOU’RE TOO BUSY TO PICK UP, WHO ARE YOU TRYING TO KID.
KARKAT: YOU ARE QUITE POSSIBLY THE ONLY PERSON ON THIS METEOR WHO’S GOT EVEN LESS ON HIS NUTRITION PLATEAU THAN ME.
KARKAT: EVEN THE MAYOR HAS A MORE DEMANDING SCHEDULE THAN WE DO, LET’S FACE THE FUCKING FACTS.
KARKAT: WHAT. DID YOU THINK CAN TOWN RUNS ITSELF??
KARKAT: FAT CHANCE.
KARKAT: DAVE.
KARKAT: GOD DAMN IT DAVE.
KARKAT: I HAVE A PROBLEM.
KARKAT: NO.
KARKAT: *WE* HAVE A PROBLEM.

Karkat’s attempt to reach out to Dave says a lot about both the meteor crew’s current state of affairs and Karkat’s inner drive for leadership. It also says a lot that Dave is the first one he contacts, instead of Rose or Terezi, the usual experts on Sburb-related matters. We’re right about to find out why he chose to contact Dave.

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