Cookie Fonster Critiques Homestuck Part 13 Rewritten: Avenging the Fallen Casino

Introduction

Part 12.2 | Part 13 | Part 14 >

Intermission, Part 1 of 2

Pages 1154-1264 (MSPA: 3054-3164)

Link to old version

It’s time to start Act 2!

Just kidding.

OK so here’s the deal. In the Homestuck community reread, we’re doing the first half of the Midnight Crew intermission today. Partway through reading the intermission, I suddenly realized just how good it is. So good that I decided to skip to the intermission in my rewritten blog posts and slog through Act 2 later. Yes you read that right: I’m not skipping the intermission, but skipping to the intermission.

Act 2 was a little boring at parts, but Act 3 was a lot more fun and enjoyable and ended with an AMAZING flash. The intermission though, I’m suddenly in love with everything about it so I’ll jump right in and blog about it, this time doing this story arc the justice it deserves. This post will cover the first half of the intermission and next post will cover the second half.

Your name is SPADES SLICK.

If there’s any doubt that Homestuck is best experienced reread over and over, the intermission shatters that doubt. The first time reading it, it’s kind of weird and confusing, a complete departure from the first three acts. But the more you reread it, the better it somehow becomes.

Our new protagonist is Spades Slick, leader of the Midnight Crew. His introduction page goes like so:

Your name is SPADES SLICK. You are the leader of a notoriously vicious gang of mobsters called the MIDNIGHT CREW. A rival gang known as THE FELT recently knocked over one of your favorite casinos. Your long quest of revenge has finally taken you through the front door of the mansion belonging to their loathsome boss, LORD ENGLISH. 

Your subordinates, CLUBS DEUCE, DIAMONDS DROOG, and HEARTS BOXCARS have been dispatched to various locations throughout the mansion to begin carrying out your mission. Your objective is to locate and crack English’s SECRET VAULT, and plunder its mysteries. 

That’s the business end of it. The pleasure will be painting this ugly house red with the blood of those miserable green motherfuckers.

The new setting is introduced masterfully. Every detail of everything is something that’s never even been hinted at before. Well OK, we did meet the Midnight Crew as characters in Hussie’s in-universe webcomic but that doesn’t count, because this time the setting is nothing like the old comic. Everything is colored green and based on stock images, with a whole new set of enemies and a mention of what seems to be the final boss of this arc. The premise is all based around the destruction of a casino; since Slick is an iteration of Jack Noir, he’ll stop at nothing to get revenge. Is it any wonder that this guy is such a fan favorite?

Yeah I know, blah blah blah, the intermission seems to be unrelated to the main storyline at first but it actually is related. I’ll go over this arc and its connection to the acts as I go along. Also Slick characterizes Jack Noir, blah blah blah, I’ll go over this characterization as I go along too. Don’t have time for nonsense.

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Cookie Fonster Critiques Homestuck Part 3 Rewritten: Immersive Simulation Gone Apocalyptic

Introduction

Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 >

Act 1, Part 3 of 3

Pages 138-247 (MSPA: 2038-2147)

Link to old version

Coming up with new names for these posts is pretty fun.
Spoiler: “Down the Chitinous Windhole” will not be renamed.

Welcome aboard to the wonderful, mysterious world of SBURB! Come join as I play the role of a first-time reader, fallen into the trap of confusion that catches many readers of Act 1.

The first thing we see of the game is Rose viewing John’s house, with symbols and icons related to captchalogue cards, seemingly used for moving and adding things to John’s house. “Wait a minute,” the reader thinks, “this isn’t your usual video game.” Is Rose able to edit a digital recreation of John’s house? Or is this a real live camera, able to edit things from afar?

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Cookie Fonster Critiques Homestuck Part 2 Rewritten: The Fatherly Miniboss

Introduction

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 >

Act 1, Part 2 of 3

Pages 47-137 (MSPA: 1947-2037)

Link to old version

Most of the title pictures for these rewritten posts are probably going to be the same as the old versions. 
Most of the titles for these rewritten posts are probably not going to be the same as the old versions. 

NOTE: This is still not a restart of my Homestuck post series. I’m only rewriting my first 27 posts to better match them with my current quality standards. Post 83 is planned for late March!

Also, my first 27 posts now list the new homestuck.com page numbers as well as the old MSPA page numbers. Hope I’ll do the rest soon enough.

John leaves his room, and here’s our first impression of his father. A slightly crazy guy that likes comedians, pranks, and clowns. This is where I stop having the impression Hussie just came up with things right off the bat and expanded upon them later; I’m almost certain he always intended for these clowns to become a plot point. Either that, or he decided the harlequin doll was a fun idea to put in the sprite and it naturally progressed into something big from there. I can tell Hussie had too much fun writing the scene with Gamzee where it turned out everything tied together.

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Cookie Fonster Critiques Homestuck Part 1 Rewritten: Bedroom Screwaround Session, Rewritten

Introduction | Part 1 | Part 2 >

Act 1, Part 1 of 3

Pages 1-46 (MSPA: 1901-1946)

NOTE: This is not a restart of my Homestuck post series. It’s just an experiment where I try going through the beginning of the comic in the style of my most recent Homestuck posts. My next Homestuck post (EDIT: that isn’t a rewrite) will continue where I left off at Act 6 Act 3. 

I made this almost a month ago and was originally going to release this alongside some other stuff, but I kind of abandoned the other stuff so enjoy this on its own instead. I feel like it’s in the spirit of the /r/homestuck community reread that’s going on right now.

“Bedroom Screwaround Session, Remastered” is already taken, god damn it.

Homestuck’s starting page… everyone who’s been invested in the comic knows how it goes. “A young man stands in his bedroom. It just so happens that today, the 13th of April, 2009, is this young man’s birthday. Though it was thirteen years ago he was given life, it is only today he will be given a name! What will the name of this young man be?” The beginning of Homestuck builds off the intro of the prior MS Paint Adventures, by introducing a protagonist in a simple setting, but quite a bit more elaborate than prior.

I would go into more detail about this opening page, but the beginning of the comic is kind of hard to talk about without comparing it to later parts so I think I’ll go sparse on commentating on all the useless nonsense. Not to mention that way too many Homestuck analyses similar to this one start strong by dissecting this simple first page and then fall off.

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New post series! (Cookie Fonster’s Homestuck post series introduction)

One day, I decided to start a blog post series in which I critique the popular story webcomic Homestuck as I read all the way through it for the third time. By critique, I meant that I would mostly review and discuss the stuff in it, but not really negatively, since I’m a pretty big fan of Homestuck. However, as I progressed through my re-read, the posts grew to be in-depth commentary on the comic, to the point where I wish I posted that way the entire time. You can start reading from the beginning, but my early posts kind of don’t have all that much substance; my current posting style started at post 28, the beginning of Act 5 Act 2, which may be a good starting point (see links below). I am currently in the process of fixing this problem by rewriting my first 27 posts. The post series is meant for people who have read Homestuck in its entirety, because the posts will contain spoilers for stuff that happens later.

Before we begin, I’d like to give a shout-out to this blog known only as “Let’s Re-Read Homestuck”, the blog that inspired this post series. It’s a very well-written unfinished Homestuck reread blog that you should check out if you like my posts. Also check out Fletcher Wortmann’s It’s Hard and Nobody Understands, another excellent unfinished Homestuck commentary document that helped inspire this as I went along.

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