Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 107: Marty McFly Refuses to Fight the Incredible Hulk

Introduction

< Part 106 | Part 107 | Part 108 >

Pages 6376-6396

Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 1, Part 3 of 5

Alternate post title: The Wonderful World of Strider Malaise

I’ll finish A6A6I1 before next 4/13, I promise. I’m setting this goal because this act (screw calling it a sub-sub-intermission) ends with a scene that I’ve been looking forward to covering for a LONG time now and I’m worried that whatever content comes out on Homestuck’s 11th anniversary might clog up my brain again.

Dirk is out of the loop both literally and figuratively.

Also, just like last time, I’m quoting all of Dirk’s conversation with Arquiusprite in images instead of text.

Picking up from where we left off, it’s time to see what Dirk is up to. He’s flying through the outer reaches of the alpha session just like the three different versions of Jack Noir, contacting Arquiusprite as a last resort to figure out what the hell is going on.

With these three lines alone, it’s already clear that the Condesce’s plan for what to do with Dirk is working exactly as intended: she has no use for him whatsoever and used Jade to warp him as far away from the action as possible. Kind of sucks that this guy is shafted for so much of Act 6 Act 6, but I guess that’s just what the empress thinks of him.

Here, Arquiusprite does what he does best: providing bizarre trivia on things absolutely no one asked about. This is what he does for most of this conversation, which is hilarious for the reader but painfully useless for Dirk.

Continue reading

Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 106: Selfie Reminiscence and Hangover Duality

Introduction

< Part 105 | Part 106 | Part 107 >

Pages 6300-6323, 6343-6375

Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 1, Part 2 of 5

Featuring the long-awaited return of the eggy looking thing.

I hope you enjoyed this brief mass influx of Homestuck posts. Classes are resuming online on Tuesday for me, which means that until late April or early May I’ll probably be releasing posts at a rate no faster than weekly.

Returning to the three-way selection screen, I’m going to first select Dave’s planet on the left, then Rose’s planet on the right.

Dave’s part of the selection screen features him exploring his childhood bedroom for the first time in three years, in a memorable scene that the author clearly had WAY too much fun writing.

Continue reading

Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 105: Cagey, Smirk-Tortured Info-Morsels

Introduction

< Part 104 | Part 105 | Part 106 >

Pages 6278-6299, 6324-6342

Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 1, Part 1 of 5

I think this is somehow my first time ever naming a post after a Karkat line????

Also, yay for new Homestuck posts three days in a row.

I’ve been bored out of my mind the past few weeks and it probably shows with the ridiculous amount of content I’ve been outputting lately. Enjoy this post during this stream of rapid activity, which might continue even after the spring semester resumes due to staying at home all day.

Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 1 of Homestuck, or A6A6I1 for short, begins with a dramatic flash that does insanely cool things with Homestuck’s website (which was preserved on the move away from Flash!!!!!). The flash uses a song called “Gold Pilot” which is a HUGE fan favorite among the comic’s soundtrack (and honestly a little overrated in my opinion), in a way that interestingly matches with the song’s original intent as a theme for Becquerel instead of the Psiioniic or however I’m supposed to spell it, and features Grimbark Jade piloting the trolls’ meteor into a Reckoning portal so she can do cool plot stuff.

Continue reading

Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 104: BEDROOM SCREWAROUND SESSION, REIMAGINED.

Introduction

< Part 103 | Part 104 | Part 105 >

Pages 6243-6277

Act 6 Act 6 Act 1

A YOUNG MALE HOMO SAPIEN IS TRAPPED IN HIS ROOM

Welp, this is happening. There’s no turning back now. Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck has now finally reached the Homosuck section. You BETTER be ready.

Act 6 Act 6 of Homestuck starts with the comic’s website getting a makeover in Caliborn’s style, with a flash that begins like Act 6’s opening flash…

… until the curtains fade to crudely drawn dark green ones accompanied by a fart noise that leads to Caliborn horribly playing piano, ending with an obnoxiously long applause that he won’t let you skip (I remember being caught so off guard by that my first time reading Homestuck). I’m glad to see this flash was successfully preserved in the move to homestuck.com; either it was translated to HTML5 or was already in that format, I don’t know which. Website gripes regardless, [S] Act 6 Act 6 does an excellent job preparing readers for a saga of utter hilarity.

Continue reading

Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 103: Mobster Reformation with Additional Throwbacks

Introduction

< Part 102 | Part 103 | Part 104 >

Pages 6111-6242 (I think I’m going to stop listing the MSPA page numbers, just makes it more cluttered and I already forgot to do so the last few posts)

Act 6 Intermission 5, Part 5 of 5

John’s triumphant face represents me finishing my posts for part 3 of Homestuck.

I’m officially putting my Homestuck post series back in the swing of things once again! The reason why has to do with two circumstances: (1) the coronavirus pandemic that’s affecting the entire world and causing so much to go on lockdown and forcing everyone to be homest-*gets shot* and (2) me finishing a musical project and getting burnt out on making musical stuff, which led me to get back into this project that isn’t about making music. The first 40% or so of this post I wrote back in January of this year, but the rest I wrote just yesterday over the course of a few hours because I was kind of bored. Right now I’m in an extended spring break, and the rest of this spring semester will be all online classes which is still difficult for me to even process.

Anyway, now that I’m done with Part 3 of Homestuck (A6A1 to A6I5), I’m going to roughly list out my plans for Part 4 of Homestuck:

  • A6A6A1: 1 post
  • A6A6I1: 5 posts
  • A6A6A2: 1 post
  • A6A6I2: 4 posts
  • most of the rest of A6A6: up in the air
  • [S] Collide and following pages: 1 post
  • Act 7 and credits: 1 post

I’ll also go ahead and confess that I’m really, really looking forward to covering a certain part of A6A6I1 that introduces us to a certain token heterosexual romance (John/Roxy if it wasn’t obvious). I’m very glad I didn’t get to that part before the epilogues dropped.

I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE I HATE PUPPET PEOPLE.

Act 6 Intermission 5 Intermission 5 starts off with a humorous callback to a memorable scene from the Midnight Crew intermission, where Hearts Boxcars was swamped with clones of Eggs and Biscuits (which is how he ended up spending the majority of the intermission). It’s also a humorous way to demonstrate Caliborn’s ever-changing names for the Felt’s species.

Continue reading

Random blog update

  • WordPress is still dreadfully buggy and annoying to use
  • This semester is still an insane workload and I’ve dedicated my remaining creative energy to music stuff
  • Homestuck^2 so far is absolute garbage and I hate even acknowledging that it exists
  • Sonic Robo Blast 2 v2.2 is the actual best thing ever and if you haven’t played it yet you’re really missing out

Also, I’ve been sitting on my next mainline Homestuck post (part 103) which has been unfinished for over a month now. I doubt I’ll get this post series back into the swing of things until May at the very earliest, unfortunately. Know that despite this current burnout, I probably always will love Homestuck to death.

In the mean time, I’ll go ahead and post an underappreciated track (click the link) made for the SiIvaGunner: King for Another Day Tournament, a giant musical project that was arguably the most fun I had doing anything ever.

Update on slow posting schedule

Trust me, I won’t let my promise of having a faster Homestuck post schedule in 2020 go unfulfilled. I really should have mentioned sooner on this blog that my laptop hasn’t been in good condition since last September, which is a big part of why my posts were released so slowly in the last few months of the year. Now I’ve finally gotten around to ordering a new laptop, which should arrive a few days from now. My posts will most definitely be faster, for real, and I mean it this time, when the new computer happens.

Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 102: The Great Metafictional Nostalgia Trip

Introduction

< Part 101 | Part 102 | Part 103 >

Pages 6055-6110

Act 6 Intermission 5, Part 4 of 5 (probably not 6)

I’ll only split Act 6 Intermission 5 into six parts if I feel I absolutely have to, like if the next post becomes insanely huge. Really don’t want to ruin my Pitbull pun from my last post.

This is my first Homestuck post of 2020!!! As I’ve said on Twitter, I intend on releasing posts regularly (on my usual once to twice a week basis) throughout at least the first half of the year, and boy am I excited to get back in the swing of things. I’ve estimated that I’ll reach Caliborn’s Masterpiece (a significant landmark point) in May or June, which means I’ll be able to make lots of progress on my Homestuck posts this year. And if I get bored of those, maybe I’ll even resume my rewritten post series.

KANAYA: …
KANAYA: …
KANAYA: …
KANAYA: …
KANAYA: …

Picking up from where we left off, we’re about to see what everyone’s favorite lesbian couple is up to in the meteor.

Continue reading

Cookie Fonster Dissects Homestuck Part 101: Faygo Degradation and Chair Tantrums

Introduction

< Part 100 | Part 101 | Part 102 >

Pages 6015-6054

Act 6 Intermission 5, Part 3 of 5 (not to be confused with Mr. 305)

My Homestuck blog post series officially has a Pitbull reference now. I have no idea why I just did that.

The first thing we see when we check back in on the meteor crew is THIS horrifying panel. Terezi reveals that her eyes are regular seeing troll eyes once more, which is an image that feels INCREDIBLY wrong, and rightfully so. Her eyes are pulsing red as if she isn’t used to not wearing her dragon hood, her mouth is in a weird frown, and there are heavy bags under her eyes that tell us what shape Terezi is in right now.

Karkat’s facial expression tells us more than words ever could. Sometimes the guy just mirrors readers’ reactions to story events SO WELL.

This panel, man. Terezi is surrounded by these horrible bottles of Faygo and clown horns, but she’s still carrying a scalemate plush to remind us that she’s the same Terezi Pyrope we’ve followed since Act 4.

Continue reading