Cookie Fonster Fondly Recalls Eurovision 2023 (Final): A Duel Between Jury and Televote Bait

Intro Post

< 2023 Semifinals | 2023 Final | 2024 Semifinals >

With the release of this post, I’ve finished my original goal back when I started this blog post series! But now, I have one more year left to review. Be patient for my 2024 posts, OK?


Introduction

Liverpool, England got to host the final of a special edition of Eurovision, the first to be co-hosted by two countries. The presenters consisted of three women, the same ones who hosted the semifinal, plus one man who joined them for the final. We have British actress and TV host Hannah Waddingham (or as I like to call her, the British Petra Mede), British singer Alesha Dixon, Ukrainian singer Julia Sanina, and for the final, the BBC commentator for Eurovision who’s originally from Ireland: Graham Norton. His presence among the hosts parallels Terry Wogan in 1998, the last time Britain hosted. Terry and Graham both alternated between hosting and commentating, because for the Brits, Eurovision wouldn’t be what it is without a sarcastic Irishman in the commentator booth. While Terry Wogan commentated solo in 1998, Graham Norton alternated with one of the semifinal commentators, Mel Giedroyc. I’ll be watching their commentary for the grand final.

The postcards did something special this year: they showcased three landmarks in Ukraine, the United Kingdom, and the country about to participate that each had something in common, such as universities, opera houses, or botanical gardens. In the third country, we see the contestant performing an activity of their choice, and oh my god they’re so fun to watch. They’re my favorite Eurovision postcards of all time and I’ll discuss further why they’re so great in the general thoughts.

The final results were a battle between two strong competitors: Sweden’s song that was blatantly designed to be popular, and Finland’s song which naturally became an enormous fan favorite. Sweden won the jury vote with 340 points and Finland won the televote with 376 points, but despite Finland’s bigger televote score, Sweden earned their seventh victory. Finland’s fan favorite got second place, and third place was somehow a girl bop from Israel. I won’t even mention which country got last place. It breaks my heart too much.

Ah yes, I remember the opening film and act with its new arrangement of Stefania! The BBC tricked me into thinking every past contest would be as good as this, god dammit. And the early contests with their orchestral reprises of the last winner tricked me into thinking every contest would open with a lovely rearrangement of the past winner.

That was an absolutely perfect flag parade and intro with the hosts—I stayed engaged all the way through. I love the parade alternating between British pop hits and Ukrainian Eurovision entries—an admission that Eurovision is far more influential to the Ukrainian music industry than to the UK’s, but the British music industry is still nothing to scoff at—and I love the 2023 flag parade in general. And the hosts’ opening is perfect too, I love that they tied it in with an announcement that Luxembourg would return next year. Before too long, we get to the first song of the evening, which is…

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