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Cookie Fonster Gets to Know Eurovision 2013 (Semifinals): Introducing the Queen of Hosts

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Intro Post

< 2012 Final | 2013 Semifinals | 2013 Final >

Introduction

Whenever Sweden hosts Eurovision, it never takes long for them to decide on an arena. The big three cities (Stockholm, Gothenburg, and Malmö) all compete to host, a few other cities sometimes throw their hat in but never stand a serious chance, and most of the arenas are eliminated due to sports schedule conflicts. For Eurovision 2013, the winning building was a place I will be inside in less than a month: the Malmö Arena.

Inside the arena, we find 39 countries competing for the grand prize, directed by the most beloved host in Eurovision history. Say hello to our lord and savior Petra Mede (be sure to roll the R). That’s right: after all those three-host years, Sweden picked the first solo presenter since 1995. I could not be more thankful. Petra is the absolute perfect Eurovision host and I can see why she was brought back for 2016 and 2024. If she was a My Little Pony character, her cutie mark* would be the Eurovision trophy. She shares the honor of hosting multiple Eurovision contests with two other hosts: Katie Boyle (1960, 1963, 1968, 1974) and Jacqueline Joubert (1959, 1961).

Armenia returned to Eurovision after skipping 2012, while four countries chose not to return: Bosnia and Herzegovina, Portugal, Slovakia, and Turkey. Portugal came back the next year, but we won’t see any more of the other three countries, except one last Bosnian entry in 2016. Eurovision came damn close to featuring a complete map of Europe, but for the foreseeable future that ship has sailed.

One change this year that I am very happy about is that the running order is no longer random! As I’ve mentioned way too many times, randomized song order will inevitably lead to strange coincidences and annoyances, like too many dance pop songs in a row or a ballad unfittingly placed at the start, so this is a very welcome change. Also, this is the first year where viewers could vote using the Eurovision mobile app.

I watched the first semifinal with Swedish commentary, and the second with Norwegian commentary. That’s because a friend of mine provided both videos in HD. This will be an adorably tiny post, covering only 13 songs.

* Colloquially known as a “butt tattoo”. It indicates a pony’s special talent.

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Cookie Fonster’s Eurovision 1998 Reflections: Dana, Guildo, and Other Such Icons

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Intro Post

< 1997 Review | 1998 Review | 1999 Review >

Please enjoy my last Eurovision review of 2023! I will review Eurovision 1999 after the new year. For the rest of this year, I’ll focus on getting other projects done and finding jobs, since I was recently fired from my latest one. Luckily I already paid for my Eurovision trip, including flights, tickets, and a place to stay.

Introduction

In many ways, Eurovision 1998 was the end of an era for the contest. It was the last year where countries had to sing in their own languages, the last year with an orchestra, and until 2023, the last contest to take place in the United Kingdom. Fifteen different British cities applied to host the contest, and the winner was the second largest city in the UK: Birmingham. But it was also the start of an era for the contest: it was the first where most results came from televoting and it kickstarted a trend of LGBT visibility. More trivially, it was the first year where the names of countries appeared on screen during the songs.

Five countries were relegated from this contest (Austria, Bosnia-Herzegovina, Denmark, Iceland, Russia) and five returned from 1996 (Belgium, Finland, Israel, Romania, Slovakia). Italy willfully skipped and North Macedonia made their proper debut, after not qualifying in 1996. Israel famously sent Dana International, the first transgender person to ever compete in Eurovision, and she won the contest.

As with the last two years, the female presenter handled the voting while the male presenter had a different job. In 1996 it was watching over the green room, in 1997 it was the interval act, and in 1998 it was commentary. That’s right: this year, Terry Wogan both hosted and commentated on this contest!* I’m glad he got to host before he became bitter about the contest. Even if I could understand every language in Europe, I would still think the only acceptable way to watch the contest was with British commentary, so that’s what I did.

Interestingly, neither of this contest’s hosts are native to the UK: Terry Wogan is Irish and Ulrika Jonsson is Swedish. However, both had been working for years as BBC presenters. The contest featured four other Eurovision hosts as a special guest. Their, or should I say her name is Katie Boyle, whose hair had gone gray but looked sharp and confident as ever. It’s weird to think she outlived Terry Wogan by two years.

* As far as I know, the only other people who did that were Léon Zitrone (1978) and Graham Norton (2023).

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Cookie Fonster Demystifies Eurovision 1979: Dschinghis Khan and Some Other Stuff

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Intro Post

< 1978 Review | 1979 Review | 1980 Review >

Introduction

Eurovision 1979 was the first of four contests hosted outside Europe: three in Israel and one in Azerbaijan. The one contest hosted in Turkey was in its European portion. Both 1979 and 1999 were hosted in the Jerusalem International Convention Center, meaning they’re tied for the southernmost Eurovision contest; 2019 was a little further north, in Tel Aviv. It was also the easternmost host city until 2012, when Azerbaijan hosted. The introduction sequence gave me a feel for the enormous history of Jerusalem. It’s a holy city for three major religions, it’s been fought over by many nations and empires, and it’s the subject of a dispute today.

All countries returned from last year, except for Turkey—their Arab neighbors pressured them to skip it, even though they had a song ready. It was Monaco’s last time participating until 2004. Israel won the contest twice in a row, becoming the third country to do so after Spain and Luxembourg. However, the most famous entry is Germany’s “Dschinghis Khan”, a cult classic to this day.

This contest was hosted by two presenters, again one male and one female. The female presenter was a member of the trio that sang for Israel in 1976. As a change of pace, I watched this contest with French commentary. Before the songs began, the commentator suggested the viewer to get a pencil and paper and rate every song like the juries do. As it so happens, I am doing something similar on a strange, newfangled device called a “laptop”.

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Cookie Fonster Writes About Eurovision 1977: No More English for You

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Intro Post

< 1976 Review | 1977 Review | 1978 Review >

Introduction

Hosted in London, England for the fourth and last time, Eurovision 1977 had a lineup of 18 countries like last year. Yugoslavia skipped out, not to return until 1981, and Sweden returned, starting a streak of attendance unbroken to this day. It was almost going to be the first Eurovision with an Arab country participating, namely Tunisia. However, Tunisia withdrew before selecting a song. Despite many of them being in the European Broadcasting Union, Arab countries have been reluctant to join Eurovision due to Israel’s presence. Lebanon almost participated in 2005 and had a song ready, but withdrew for the same reason. The only Arab state to participate was Morocco in 1980, in a year where Israel skipped out.

In this contest, the language rule was brought back with an asterisk. If a country selected a song before the change was announced, it was exempt from the language rule. That’s why Germany and Belgium sang in English this year.

This contest was delayed by a month because the technicians were on strike. It was held in May instead of the then-usual April. Because of the strikes, there were no postcards this time; shots of the audience were put in their place, which just isn’t the same. I wanted to watch this contest with French commentary due to the winner, but I couldn’t find it, so I settled for German.

In the intro, when the German commentator mentioned Prince Charles of Wales, I realized that up to 2022, Eurovision took place within Elizabeth II’s reign. If only Eurovision ended before her death, it could be like the famous fact that Homestuck ran entirely within Barack Obama’s presidency.

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