Tag Archives: eurovision 2024

Cookie Fonster Comes to Terms with Eurovision 2024 (Final): The Year of Native-Language Bangers

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Intro Post

< 2024 Semifinals | 2024 Final | 2025 Semifinals >

This is it, everyone—the grand finale of my Eurovision blog post series. Till May 2025 anyway, but that’s a matter for another time. I hope you enjoy reading this post, but I’m not done just yet—I still have a few bonus posts to write!

Introduction

“It’s been quite an eventful Eurovision this year, but hopefully tonight, we’ll bring you the usual beauty, mayhem, madness, and of course male nudity.” Never change, Graham Norton. Never change.

After Joost Klein from the Netherlands got disqualified and the protests against Israel’s participation continued, the final of Eurovision 2024 felt like it could collapse any minute. In the dress rehearsals, some of the contestants (like Ireland’s Bambie Thug) refused to show up, others (like Norway’s Gåte) almost withdrew from the contest, and Slimane from France paused amidst his song to give a speech pleading for peace. This was not a normal Eurovision year at all, but let me tell you… I flew across the ocean to Malmö for Eurovision, so as salty as I was, I did not let the Eurovision drama or my personal drama dent my excitement. I went to a bar in Malmö to watch the grand final with a few friends and really did have a great time there. It was also nice to watch it in the warm indoors, since I had underestimated how much warm clothing I needed to pack.

We should all be very fortunate that this year had such talented hosts to keep fans’ spirits afloat: the queen of Eurovision hosts Petra Mede, and the Swedish-Canadian actress Malin Åkerman. It was the first time a pair of women hosted Eurovision, and the third time Petra was one of the hosts. Another thing that belies this year’s hectic drama are the postcards, which are simplistic in contrast to 2023: they show a map of where each country is, clips from two of each country’s prior Eurovision songs, footage of each participant in their country filmed on cell phones, and finally a dramatized shot of the artist. I feel like this is a very SVT style of doing postcards, since they love their efficiency and minimalism.

In spite of all the protests, Israel’s controversial entry landed fifth place thanks to televoters, and fans don’t agree on how it managed that. France achieved an excellent fourth place with a ballad by a man who sings his heart out, Ukraine landed third place singing in the language they used to be afraid to sing in, then the top two are both particularly special songs. The massive fan favorite “Rim Tim Tagi Dim” earned Croatia their best result in history, a second place. Switzerland won for the first time since 1988 with “The Code”, sung by Nemo Mettler, the first non-binary artist to win Eurovision. In this post, you better get ready for me defending Switzerland’s victory, though I would’ve been equally happy with Croatia taking the prize.

The grand final starts with Sweden’s twice Eurovision contestant Björn Hwifs… sorry, I mean Björn Skifs. Damn sj-sound, I’m still not over how many different spellings it has. Anyway, he performs his famous cover of “Hooked on a Feeling” to open up the contest, then comes the flag parade set to a medley of Swedish international hits in English. It has a more restrained feeling than the flag parade of the last two years, perhaps due to the nasty drama of this year, or perhaps because the contestants, audience, and production crew were all unusually cautious this year.

I should mention that as was the case in 2010 and 2011, viewers were allowed to vote since the first song started. Given Israel’s voting campaign I’m not sure it was a good idea this year, but I’ll get to that later. For now, let’s begin this unusually controversial grand final.

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Cookie Fonster Comes to Terms with Eurovision 2024 (Semifinals): The Best and Worst Year Simultaneously

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Intro Post

< 2023 Final | 2024 Semifinals | 2024 Final >

I’m almost done with this blog post series! I just have the 2024 grand final and then a few bonus posts in mind. Then I don’t know what the hell I’ll do with my time.

Introduction

(The best year of Eurovision was actually 2021, but shh. Let me be dramatic for the sake of this title.)

And so, we’ve finally arrived at the most recent Eurovision contest as of this writing. It was filled with exorbitant amounts of drama, the most drama in… who the hell knows how long? Is it comparable to all the ruckus Italy caused when hosting 1991? The controversies Russia caused hosting 2009, or Azerbaijan in 2012? Or going back further, the quadruple tie of 1969 hosted in Francoist Spain? I’ll save most of my drama ranting for “Hurricane”, the controversial Israeli entry of this year, and try my best to be positive otherwise. Even though one of the biggest fan favorites of the year, “Europapa” from the Netherlands, was disqualified after qualifying from the second semifinal. This didn’t just piss off fans; it also angered the broadcaster AVROTROS who was very excited to share their Eurovision entry and insisted it was unjust to disqualify Joost Klein. And even though Israel insisted on sending a song that they knew would be controversial with zero regard for how other broadcasters or viewers would feel, which caused massive protests and the EBU to bend backwards… I’ll try to be positive anyway.

The usual big three Swedish cities bidded to host Eurovision 2024, plus an outsider: the subarctic city of Örnskoldsvik, which happens to have a nice big arena that has hosted Melodifestivalen heats. The Malmö Arena was the only viable option due to scheduling issues in the other venues, so that’s what SVT went with. It turns out that Malmö was a fitting city to host this year, considering the contest went to the very same arena after the last time Loreen won. It’s also a very modern and polished city that saw tons of growth after the bridge to Copenhagen opened in 1999, and it’s got a really nice network of trains and buses, so it’s well-suited to host Eurovision. But for Israeli fans, Malmö was an unfortunate city to host due to the amount of immigrants who protested against the country’s participation in Eurovision, or for some people, even the country’s existence. This meant that most fans from Israel had to hide all signs of their nationality, including speaking Hebrew, and it’s really sad that they had to do this in the 21st century.

This was the first Eurovision year that I visited in person. It was my first time in Scandinavia and my first time visiting both Denmark and Sweden; lovely countries that I’d be glad to visit again. I wrote a blog post about the trip months ago, but honestly I sugar coated the description a little bit. Not only was I stressed out from all the Eurovision drama, I also got into some really bad personal drama that I won’t elaborate on in public. But… despite everything, I am extremely glad I got to go on this trip. And I promise you this won’t be my last time visiting Eurovision.

Aside from all the drama, Luxembourg came back to Eurovision after last participating in 1993! Romania skipped out, which means this contest had 37 competing countries just like last year. And the semifinals have an exciting change: the Big Five and host country now each perform in the semifinal they can vote in, but still automatically qualify. This is a long overdue change that greatly offsets these countries’ disadvantage, and I’m really happy about it. And after the success of worldwide voting last year, the rest of the world’s voting period was extended to begin 24 hours before each show. I think Australia should have this luxury too.

To twist things up, I will watch the first semifinal with Luxembourgish commentary, then the second with German commentary by Thorsten Schorn, who has a picture of the old commentator in his booth. This will be my first time watching the semis’ TV broadcasts in full, since I watched the first as a rehearsal from the arena, and the second as a live show from the arena. And I will include “Europapa” in this post, not the grand final post.

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Eurovision Song Contest Malmö 2024: What was it like going in person?

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From May 4 to 12, 2024, I went on my big trip of the year: a trip to Sweden and Denmark to watch the Eurovision Song Contest 2024 in person, hosted in Malmö on the southern tip of Sweden. It was my first time going to both countries, my first time going to the contest, and my second time following it live. As an American, I naturally got tons of questions as to how I got interested in Eurovision. The long answer is rather complicated (I explained it in this post, skip to Dancing Lasha Tumbai), so the short answer is “an Australian friend got me into it” and that’s good enough for most people.

Before the show started (May 4-6)

I was originally going to visit two cities on this trip: Copenhagen (where I’d be staying) and Malmö (where the contest took place). But after arriving at the Copenhagen airport on May 5, I added a third city in the trip: Gothenburg, where I met up with my Swedish friend Liv. She’s exactly as nerdy about Eurovision as me and this was also her first time visiting Eurovision, but unlike me she’s a lifelong fan. After arriving in the Gothenburg train station, I hugged Liv and we had a long excited conversation about what all we’d do together, then we explored some of her favorite places in the city. I wish I had taken more pictures of Gothenburg: it’s a delightful homely city and I’d love to visit again sometime.

Liv and me by Scandinavium, the building in Gothenburg that hosted Eurovision 1985.
We hummed the postcard music from that year while passing by that building. Every postcard that year had the same damn background music.

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Unorganized predictions and hopes for Eurovision 2024 (Volume 4)

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At the time of my previous predictions post, 29 out of 37 songs for Eurovision 2024 were released. Now all 37 have been confirmed, so that means I have eight to comment on.

First off, the elephant in the room: the country that many fans, myself included, think shouldn’t be allowed in Eurovision this year. I’m not a big fan of Israel’s entry (1) as a song, nor the message it gives. It’s just an average ballad full of generic four-chord progressions and overall it feels kind of… artificial, if that makes any sense. Like it’s deliberately designed to make the audience feel sad, rather than the singer expressing her own thoughts on how the war makes her feel.

On a brighter note, let’s talk about Australia (2). My god, their song feels so Australian! It has a different attitude and vibe to all the European entries and overall sounds spacious and cultural. Another internally selected entry that feels very cultural is Greece (3). It’s a return to form for Greece, yet at the same time a totally new direction. It strongly reminds me of “Russian Woman” from 2021, which means it sounds exotic and harsh but intriguing at the same time, and full of ethnic personality.

I would love it so much if in 2025, Germany went the same route as Greece and Australia and internally selected a quality song in German. I think that would suit Germany in Eurovision better than a national final. I mentioned this idea in a long, pessimistic rant about Germany’s approach to Eurovision yesterday, so maybe you could read that and then continue this blog post.

Portugal (4) joined Serbia in sending a slow, sentimental native language song selected by a national final—not far from what I imagined Portugal sending. I love that Portugal still remains true to themselves after all those years. Sweden (5) had the last national final of the year and is sending a song that’s not as unforgettable as the title would imply—a predictable Swedish electronic dance song. Maybe someday, televoters are going to lose interest in these types of entries and then Sweden would need to refresh their approach. Maybe that could mean more Swedish-language or otherwise cultural songs?

Now only the Caucasus countries are left, but first I will discuss the English-language revamp of Albania’s song. It sounded like a predictable Albanian entry when it was in Albanian, but now it’s even more of a predictable Albanian entry and duller.

Now all that’s left is the Caucasus countries, all of which internally selected. For the first time, Azerbaijan (6) is singing in a significant amount of Azerbaijani! If there was any doubt that Germany has ZERO EXCUSE to pretend their language doesn’t exist, then now it’s gone. Their song is a decent enough minor key dramatic song with a handful of ethnic elements. I don’t have strong feelings about it otherwise.

I’ve gained a new appreciation for Armenia’s (7) approach to Eurovision now that I’m reviewing their Eurovision entries. They love their ethno-bops and they love sounding authentically Armenian. This time, they’re sending their second entry fully in Armenian! I wish the lyrics consisted of more Armenian words and less “la lai la”, but it’s super ethnic and super fun. It turns out Armenian is a very cool-sounding language! Fun fact: unlike the other two Caucasus countries’ national languages (Georgian and Azerbaijani), Armenian is an Indo-European language which means it’s distantly related to English.

Finally we arrive at Georgia (8), whose song is less exotic than their usual entries. It’s another dramatic minor key dance song, I’m not sure what I think of it yet. It didn’t leave a strong impression on me the first time I heard it, maybe because songs of this type are abundant in Eurovision. It might be easier to give thoughts on it when we see it live on stage.

Basically, all these entries have confirmed my suspicions that this will be like 2021 and 2022: it feels like pretty much every country is bringing a fiercely competitive song but Germany isn’t. Bitte Deutschland, ein gutes Lied auf Deutsch nächstes Jahr.

Unorganized predictions and hopes for Eurovision 2024 (Volume 3)

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Since my last predictions post, nine more entries for Eurovision 2024 have been released, so the count is at 29 out of 37—36 if Israel withdraws, which I strongly feel would be the right thing to do. I’ll give initial thoughts on each of them, but I’ll be brief so I can save the deeper thoughts for after the contest happens.

Croatia (1) sent an absolute banger this year! Although it’s in English, it has a lot in common with “Cha Cha Cha” last year: it’s a danceable electronic song that alternates between chaotic and melodic parts and it has a serious message beneath its whimsy. The same is true about the Netherlands (2), who went with EXACTLY the kind of song I was hoping Joost Klein would send. Hot damn, the chorus of “Europapa” will stay in my head for a very long time. I love how it’s hectic most of the way through then has an emotional ending and I love that it makes so much use of the Dutch language (and a bit of a few others, even German!). Both songs should do well with the televote, hopefully with the juries too.

The United Kingdom (3) was the last Big Five member to release their song. The BBC has finally figured out how to stand out in post-language rule Eurovision: send songs by recognizable names that accurately represent the British music scene. I hope this manages to stand out in the final, because it seems simple on the surface but is captivating once you get into it.

Iceland (4) has a nice dance beat, but it’s too repetitive musically and I doubt it’ll qualify to the final. The runner-up of their national final (“Wild West” by Bashar Murad) is a total banger with badass lyrics, you should listen to it if you haven’t. Cyprus (5) went for the overproduced girl bop route and I’m not sure it will stand out among all the other girl bops, but I quite like the chorus. I imagine it’ll be staged similarly to “Fuego”.

Austria (6) and Switzerland (7) both internally selected, I imagine with the prompt “what would hype up the audience the most?” They both understood that prompt perfectly, each in their own way. I almost want Germany to internally select knowing this, but I do not trust NDR to touch Eurovision with a ten-foot pole, plus that’d make a German-language entry even less likely. The more songs are released for this year’s semifinal, the more I suspect it’ll be like 2021 and 2022, where most countries sent a properly competitive entry and Germany didn’t. I’m more hesitant to compare it to 2023, because while that year had a lot of strong entries, it was a clear two-horse race between Sweden and Finland. 2021 was extremely open and 2022 would’ve been just as open if it weren’t for the war in Ukraine.

Serbia (8) is a strong competitor as I expected. They’re one of few countries to send something slow this year, so their song is sure to stand out. It’s got the lyrical and singing style of a Balkan ballad (a genre I adore) and the instrumental style of a regular ballad (a style that’s become more enjoyable in 2020’s Eurovision). And finally we arrive at San Marino (9) who’s sending a funky rock song in Spanish, oh my god! They really are the wildcard of Eurovision. San Marino got lucky because Spain is voting in the second semifinal.

This is shaping up to be one hell of an exciting Eurovision year, but I’m uncomfortable with the drama that Israel’s participation has caused. It would be a weight lifted off everyone’s backs if Israel sat this year out. I hope you’re smart enough not to take this as an attack on the Israeli people. The war is terrifying for both Palestinians and Israelis and all I wish for is peace between the two countries.

Unorganized predictions and hopes for Eurovision 2024 (Volume 2)

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We’ve had tons of songs confirmed for Eurovision 2024 over the course of this month and we have quite a few more to go! In my previous predictions post, only six entries were released; now the number is 20. I have 14 songs to recap in this post, so I’ll use numbers to make sure I don’t forget any.

I already made a post about Germany’s song (1). I’m so jealous of all those other countries that are sending native language songs this year, especially our fellow Germanic country of Norway. I’m getting spoiled with all those native language songs, but at the same time I feel so left out! Maybe if a native language song wins the contest in 2024, then Germany will be forced to accept that non-English songs are cool again. Because they are cool again! We are living in a time where more and more people are listening to music that isn’t in their native language or English. Even here in the US, Spanish-language music is experiencing a surge in popularity.

I was excited for other countries to imitate the success of “Cha Cha Cha” and send danceable electronic songs in their native languages, and two countries did exactly that: Estonia (2) and Lithuania (3). Both their songs are totally up my street and I’m confident they will do well. These are exactly the kind of songs I wish Germany sent this year, instead of boring radio pop.

Latvia (4) didn’t follow the trend of the other two Baltic states and went for a power ballad in English (though it does have a Latvian version). It’s not as much to my taste as the other Baltics, but it’s well-composed and I hope it breaks Latvia’s non-qualification streak. Speaking of which, I badly want Ireland to qualify this year. “Doomsday Blue” is their best entry in ages! It’s full of personality and much better suited to Eurovision than anything they’ve sent the past few years. I’m rooting for you, Bambie Thug!

Let’s discuss the rest of the Big Five. I didn’t say much about France in my last post, but now that more songs have been confirmed, I’m confident they made a strong choice this year. It’s slower-paced but powerfully sung, so it’ll stand out against the dance songs. I’m not sure how well Spain (5) will do—as we saw from songs like “Øve os på hinanden” and “The Ride”, Eurovision fans aren’t too receptive to this pumpy 80’s inspired pop. Still, their song has a passionate fanbase and distinctive personality. Italy (6) is sending a song that’s Italian in a fresh way, and finally sending a woman again. I have no doubts she will do well.

And now for Norway (7)… hot DAMN, THEIR SONG IS SO FUCKING AWESOME!!! As I said in my 2006 final review: I had a hunch they would bring one of the best entries in 2024 and I was right. But I’m so surprised they sent a native language song! I’m not sure if I like it more than Luxembourg’s boppy bop but I think it has the potential to win. Speaking of winner potential, I still think Ukraine (8) is most likely to win. Their song combines what worked in their last two winners (“1944” and “Stefania”) and is very powerful and dramatic. I just hope that if Ukraine wins this year, the country will be safe enough to host in 2025.

God dammit, the more I write about all the confirmed songs for 2024, the more jealous I get because Germany’s song is so disappointing. But at least we’re not alone in sending radio pop that sounds like it could belong to any country—I don’t think Denmark (9) will break their non-qualification streak with their repetitive radio pop song. Poland (10) and Moldova (11) probably won’t qualify either: they’re just regular electronic songs, not competitive or distinct enough. Maybe Moldova could save their song with good enough staging.

I didn’t say anything about Czechia and Slovenia previously except that their songs don’t do much to me, and unfortunately that’s still true. The Czech entry sounds like a first draft and Slovenia sent one of those songs that had a lot of effort put into it but doesn’t make me feel anything.

Malta (12) is a “SloMo” copycat, but that’s exactly why I think it’ll safely reach the finals. It makes sense for Malta to send a genre that’ll safely qualify, because they didn’t qualify for the last two years. Belgium (13) finally released their song after being the first country to select their artist. It’s a regular good song, but I admit it’s not that easy to remember how it sounds.

Finally we arrive at Finland (14), the runner-up of 2023. Their song is televote bait through and through, but as we saw in the national final results, it’s also jury repellent. I was hoping Finland’s entry would appeal to both halves of the voting, or that they’d continue the momentum of native language songs, but on the other hand this kind of hectic dance song fits Eurovision like a glove. I don’t think I can provide a full verdict on this song till I see it live from the Malmö Arena.

Oh yeah, that’s right. I’ll be in the Malmö Arena during the evening rehearsal of semifinal 1. I’m particularly excited to see Ireland, Lithuania, and Luxembourg live. I’m looking at the lineup of songs for the semifinal and I am so excited I could just burst.

We have 17 songs left for this contest—16 if Israel withdraws, which I frankly hope they do because their presence has caused so much drama. That means I’ll make two more unorganized predictions posts, the first in early March and the second when all songs are confirmed.

My initial thoughts on the German entry for Eurovision 2024

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I’m making a post dedicated to the German entry because it’s my country (at least in the Eurovision sense) and I’m salty about the choice. Defying my expectations and hopes, they went with “Always on the Run” by Isaak. It sounds like a 2010’s UK entry and you know how well those did.

It’s generic and beige radio pop with zero personality that sounds like something I’ve heard hundreds of times before and proves NDR has learned nothing. This is exactly the kind of song I wanted Germany to stop sending. The national final was overloaded with songs of this type so it was inevitable that would happen. Not a single one of these songs gripped me or inspired me, but I would have been at least somewhat happy if they sent one of the two German-language songs, because I feel very strongly that Germany needs to stop pretending their language doesn’t exist. But I’ve said that like a million times in my Eurovision blog post series.

I wrote some notes about the final on paper (listed in italics from here on out) and my ranking was: Undream You > Naiv > Oh Boy > Katze > Forever Strong > Tears Like Rain > Always on the Run > Scar > Love on a Budget. The German-language songs are bold.

  • “Undream You” is better than the rest because it has actual personality. It’s a sweet and delicate song and the singer feels the lyrics very much.
  • “Naiv” is the only song that has a clear German musical identity, aside from Germany’s tendency to send this bland radio pop. It would have continued the momentum of songs that sound recognizably German after “Blood & Glitter”.
  • “Oh Boy” is jury bait-y, a little like “Tout l’univers”, but it really feels anonymous when you get down to it.
  • “Katze” is silly fluff that takes too long to build up. It’s not as out there and futuristic as the singers seem to think it is, going by their monologue before the song.
  • “Forever Strong” is a decent effort and Max Mutzke is a great singer as ever, but it’s very ballady and I wish he sent one of his German-language songs.
  • The other four are completely forgettable radio pop.

Basically, the part of the national final that I enjoyed the most was the members of Lord of the Lost saying that even though they scored last place in 2023, they absolutely loved participating in Eurovision and it boosted their career. I think Chris Harms (the lead singer, whose last name I keep misspelling as Hams) said “Wir haben nichts verloren und alles gewonnen” (we lost nothing and won everything). He seems like such a nice guy and I respect him a lot. If you can speak German, maybe check out his reactions to the entries of Das Deutsche Finale; if not, I wrote a summary in English. He kept saying that none of them gave him goosebumps but tried his best to be polite and respectful.

Germany’s approach to Eurovision is completely broken. But if there’s one thing I learned from binging every Eurovision contest (I finished 2005 a few days ago), it’s that eventually a country will redeem itself. Think about how delighted everyone in Norway was when they won in 1985! Or when Turkey scored third place in 1997 after years of poor results, then won six years later. Still, I’m jealous of all those other countries that are sending a cool and exciting song this year.

One thing is for certain: when I’m this frustrated with my country’s approach to Eurovision, that’s how you know I have completed my transformation into a Eurovision fan. I wonder if it’s been amusing or annoying for friends of mine to witness the Eurofanification of cookiefonster.

Also I just got a ticket for Lord of the Lost’s concert in Malmö, during Eurovision week.

Unorganized predictions and hopes for Eurovision 2024

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We’re well into national final season now—six countries have released their songs so far and many more national selections are underway!

Holy fuck, holy FUCK, Luxembourg’s song this year is a total bop and I’m excited to see it on the Eurovision stage!!! It’s the first song revealed that truly clicks with me, but France and Ireland chose respectable efforts too. I love that France won’t be alone in sending a song en français this year. It means that France’s song won’t feel like the “token song in French” this year, as so often happens in modern Eurovision. As much as I complain that France cares too much about their language compared to other Eurovision countries, the truth is that I adore the French language.

Thank heavens Ireland didn’t choose that godawful boyband song from their national final. I’m not sure if “Doomsday Blue” has qualifier energy, but it was the best choice of the six. It’s got a nice varied pace and a mix of harsh and peaceful sections, unlike “Go Tobann” which is full-blast hectic.

As for the other three confirmed songs, Albania is disappointingly similar to their previous few entries and Czechia and Slovenia just don’t do much for me. Maybe a revamp could bring more life into some of them, but inevitably you won’t root for every single entry in Eurovision.

My dream 2024 German entry would be a German counterpart to “Cha Cha Cha” that hypes up the audience, but we sure as hell aren’t getting that. I wish I could say I’m rooting for one of the two German-language songs in Das Deutsche Finale, but from snippets I’ve heard of each of them, “Oh Boy” intrigues me by far the most. It’s total jury bait and will probably instill hope among German fans, but I still really fucking want Germany to embrace their own language again. Why is NDR still obsessed with the idea that radio-friendly pop does well in Eurovision, and so repulsed from German-language music? It’s about time a different German broadcaster takes on the contest.

I haven’t followed much of the other national finals, but I’d be excited if “Damdiggida” by Keiino represents Norway. Their song is infectious and full of personality, very Norwegian-sounding. It would be a fierce competitor especially for the televote. If they make it to Eurovision, I hope the juries give them more respect this year.

Out of the internally selected artists, I’m most excited for Marina Satti—she seems intent on sending a song that’s true to herself and should curtail the Swedification of Greece. The Netherlands and UK both made strong choices and I hope they deliver on stage. I’m happy the Netherlands has been embracing their language lately, but it makes my eye twitch that Germany can’t do the same.

I might make another post about my hopes for Eurovision 2024 at the end of February, we’ll see. But don’t expect anything too in-depth until I get to 2024 in my review series. Suffice to say, I have a lot to look forward to in my Eurovision trip.