Cookie Fonster Reviews Chefsache ESC 2025: German-Language Music Does Exist!

Introduction

Now the time has come for me to review the German national final for Eurovision 2025. It’s titled Chefsache ESC 2025: Wer singt für Deutschland? (Top Priority ESC 2025: Who will sing for Germany?) and it’s organized by none other than Stefan Raab, a German TV host and musician who came back to the screen in 2024 after seven years working only behind the stage. Among Eurovision fans, he’s most famous for organizing the German selection in 2010 which led to their second victory. He has a long history in Eurovision but hadn’t been involved in the contest since 2012. Most of Germany’s entries since then have been boring as hell and got bad results, so the more years passed, the more fans wanted Stefan Raab back in Eurovision. He’s back to Eurovision at long last and he says at every opportunity that his goal is for his country to win Eurovision.

Several of Stefan Raab’s decisions in this show have been questioned among fans. For one thing, the show consists of two heats, a semifinal, and a final, but in the heats the contestants didn’t sing their competing songs. Instead, they all sang covers of other popular songs or their older songs, and the juries selected who should make it to the final based on those performances. Additionally, the jury consists of only four people per show: Stefan Raab himself, his TV co-host Elton who is a music lover but doesn’t make music himself, the German singer Yvonne Catterfeld, and a different fourth jury member each show. The juries eliminate contestants in the heats and semifinal, and in the final, only the televoters decide who wins. No wait, that was changed a few days before the final, so that the juries now eliminate further down to five last songs. That’s pretty annoying because I had mentally prepared myself for a fully televote final.

I tried watching the heats live (February 14 and 15), but the covers weren’t very interesting to me, mostly just renditions of American and British pop songs. I think this was an idea that Stefan Raab insisted on, and the rest of his team didn’t question him at all because they trust every single idea he has. I was going to watch the semifinal live the next Saturday (February 22), but unfortunately that day I had to put down one of my cats. So instead, I watched the semifinal the day after—a good way to take my mind off the heartbreak of losing a pet.

The shows were all hosted by a familiar name to German Eurovision fans: Barbara Schöneberger, who hosted most of the German national finals of the past decade and seems to be the only holdover from the slop pop fests that were the last few German selections. She’s a TV and radio host from Munich, and my mom happens to be a fan of hers because of her observant humor and ability to improvise.

In this post, I won’t review the covers from the heats, nor will I split the songs between non-qualifiers and qualifiers like I did in my Supernova review. Instead, I’ll review the fourteen competing songs in their order from the semifinal, then discuss the show as a whole.

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Cookie Fonster’s Essay on Eurovision 2014 (Final): Facial Hair on the Top and Bottom

Intro Post

< 2014 Semifinals | 2014 Final | 2015 Semifinals >

This is my last blog post before I leave for my Eurovision trip on May 4 to 12. Although my Twitter account is inactive, I’ll revive it for the week to post pictures from my trip, so keep an eye out! And if anyone’s reading this who will go to Eurovision 2024, feel free to contact me on Discord (username: cookiefonster).

EDIT: I also made a blog post about my Eurovision trip. Check it out if you haven’t!


Introduction

The grand final of Eurovision 2014 starts with an opening film taking place in Copenhagen, set to a lovely reinterpretation of “Dansevise”, the Danish winner from 1963. All the countries were welcomed in a flag parade where their names were announced in English, French, and the country’s own language. For example: Armenia, L’Arménie, Hayastan. For Switzerland, they used English, French, and Swiss German.

At the extremes of the scoreboard, we find two songs relating to facial hair. A bearded drag queen named Conchita Wurst gave Austria their first win since 1966, the longest gap between a country’s two wins in Eurovision history. And right at the bottom came France with a song about mustaches—we’ll see if it was deserved or not. The Netherlands scored second place with an absolutely beautiful country song, their best result since 1975. In third place came Sweden with a swedo-pop ballad that I’m not nearly as jazzed about.

The voting was meant to be half jury and televote, but Albania and San Marino’s votes came entirely from juries, whereas Georgia came entirely from televoters because the Georgian jury votes were disqualified. Otherwise, the voting avoided the drama it ran into last year. I watched the final with British commentary by trusty Graham Norton, together with my friend and fellow Eurovision nerd named Liv.

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