Intro Post

< 2011 Semifinals | 2011 Final | 2012 Semifinals >

I know I released this post at an odd hour of the day (5 AM in the American east coast), that’s because I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t fall asleep. Sleep is for the weak anyway, we all know this. (Actually sleeping is very important, but sometimes my brain refuses to let me fall asleep.)

Also, my post schedule is going to slow down a bit because I started a new job four days ago. Probably for the best, since that means I have more time to deliberate over how I feel about each song.

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Introduction

The grand final of Eurovision 2011 (in Düsseldorf, Germany) featured 25 countries: the Big Four we’ve grown to love/hate, Italy for the first time since 1997, and the 20 qualifiers from each semifinal. In third place came Sweden, who got back on their feet after an infamous non-qualification. Italy made a strong comeback with second place, and Azerbaijan had one of the most controversial victories in Eurovision history. Many fans believe Azerbaijan cheated their way to victory, not just because they don’t like the song, also because Azerbaijan has an extensive history of voting scandals.

A few facts I didn’t mention last time: The contest was hosted by German TV presenters Anke Engelke, Judith Rakers, and Stefan Raab, the last of whom composed three German entries for Eurovision and organized the national final that led to Germany’s latest victory. Also, for the first time, the voting countries were deliberately ordered so that the winner wouldn’t be obvious from the start.

I absolutely adore the jazzy rock cover of “Satellite” that Stefan Raab opened the show with, and I love the montage of the football/soccer arena being transformed into a Eurovision arena.. I’m a huge sucker for music covered in a different genre, so this arrangement is totally up my alley. It’s so full of musical creativity! Why can’t we get these kinds of covers every year, instead of the usual unedited song reprises? Maybe I should make a chiptune rendition of “Tattoo” and pester the staff of Eurovision 2024 to use it in their show. If I beg them enough times, I’m sure they’ll say yes. And if they want a chiptune cover of “Cha Cha Cha”, I already have one ready.

I watched the grand final with Graham Norton’s British commentary.

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Finland: Da Da Dam

Artist: Paradise Oskar (Aksel Ehnström)

Language: English

Key: D major

In the postcard, I was surprised at first to see German flags waving from a building. Then I saw it was Berlin, so that checks out. In Germany it’s rare to see the German flag in public, except during sports or song contests. That’s when Germans let their patriotism go wild.

I don’t understand why this song has a nonsense title when it has such a serious story: it’s about a guy named Peter who wants to save the planet. I somewhat like this song, mostly because he has a good voice that’s suited to storytelling songs, but it gets repetitive after a while and feels too much like an imitation of last year’s “Me and My Guitar”. It would have more of an emotional impact if it was in the middle of the show after an upbeat dance song, not right at the start.

Bosnia and Herzegovina: Love in Rewind

Artist: Dino Merlin, returning from 1999 (and 1993 as composer)

Language: English, plus a few lines in Bosnian from the backing singers

Key: F♯ minor, G minor

Crazy fact that I learned from Graham Norton: Dino Merlin wrote Bosnia and Herzegovina’s formerly official national anthem, which was in use from 1992 to 1998.

This is probably the second most iconic Bosnian entry, behind “Lejla” in 2006. It’s not bad as a composition, but I find the stompy beat really distracting and I can’t say it does much for me. Italy this year will do the jazz band style so much better.

Denmark: New Tomorrow

Artist: A Friend in London

Language: English

Key: G major

Here are my notes from the semifinal about this song:

Denmark is still rewarded for this radio pop just like Ireland was with Irish ballads, and Sweden is with swedo-pop. Why did swedo-pop prevail while dano-pop fell? Though all these songs, Denmark is telling us, “You know all those English-language songs on the radio? A lot of these singers were Danish the whole time!” “Oh, oh, oh-oh” will always annoy me.

I can’t add much more to that. This is a predictable Danish entry and a predictable song in general. It scored fifth place overall: third with the juries, but only 18th with the televote. I don’t get why juries loved this type of radio pop so much.

Lithuania: C’est ma vie

Artist: Evelina Sašenko

Language: English, plus six words in French. Those are the only French lyrics this year.

Key: E minor (verses), E major (chorus)

As I said when reviewing the last Lithuanian entry, you just never know what to expect from the Baltic states. One year Lithuania sent a satirical song protesting against how western Europeans see the eastern ones, then the next year they sent a classical-sounding song that would fit perfectly in a musical, perhaps in a character introduction scene.

Normally I hate when a song has minor key verses and a major key chorus, but this song does it in a way that really works! When classical music blends major and minor key, it helps elevate the song and builds tension, but when pop or rock music does it I just find it annoying. I like these kinds of dramatic female songs best when the lyrics are sung clearly (e.g. The Voice from 1996), but this unfortunately isn’t the case for Evelina. Her singing sounds accented and hard to understand, and I don’t get the purpose of the French lyrics when she can just as well sing “it’s my life, I say yes”. Or why not sing fully in French? Wouldn’t be too unusual for the Baltic states.

I will say, there’s something charming about the part where she uses Lithuanian sign language. She integrates it into her performance well and it doesn’t distract her from singing.

Hungary: What About My Dreams?

Artist: Kati Wolf

Language: English, plus an unnecessary verse in Hungarian

Key: E minor

Agh, this song uses the same four-chord progression all the way through, and the most cliched one in existence at that. It drives me crazy when songs do that, though if something else about the song is good enough to make up for the repetitive chord progression, I’ll make an exception. This song is just bland Eurodance, so it’s a big fat no from me. Thank god the first semifinal doesn’t have any non-qualifiers I’m sad about, else I’d be pissed.

Ireland: Lipstick

Artist: Jedward (John and Edward Grimes)

Language: English

Key: C minor

Remember when I mentioned there was one qualifier from semifinal 2 that made me happy? This is the one. It feels so strange to hear a song as boppy and dancey as this from Ireland. But they had to let go of the past eventually, and this year they finally did. Either this or “Irelande Douze Pointe” is the most iconic Irish entry of the 21st century.

Erica has an amusing story about this song. She learned in 2011 that Jedward were going to represent Ireland and expected their song to be terrible, but then listened to it and fell in love with it. Going by Graham Norton’s commentary, she’s far from alone in being surprised by this song. The twins had a reputation in Europe for being annoying and hyperactive, and they’re certainly hyperactive in this song, but something about it worked well enough to land Ireland in 8th place—their most recent top ten finish.

This song has a lot of ingredients to make a swing rhythm dance song work: a boppy beat, sticky catchy melodies, and punchy synths. The staging looks campy and ridiculous, but in a way that suits the song. The melody of the chorus (she’s got her lipstick on, here I come, da da dum) can stick in viewers’ heads after just one listen. The one thing I don’t like is the abrupt ending—it sounds like the song cuts off before the final chorus, perhaps even with a key change. I would have ended this song with the ascending synth notes that precede each chorus. Regardless, I’m glad Ireland got rewarded for sending something different. Now if only they continued the momentum afterwards…

Sweden: Popular

Artist: Eric Saade. I have a friend from Sweden who can’t stand that guy. (EDIT: not Liv just to be clear)

Language: English

Key: C♯ minor (verses), D minor (chorus), E♭ minor

From this year onwards, we can say goodbye to Sweden ever sending anything other than flashy swedo-pop. Although I do like some Swedish entries from 2011 onwards, my fundamental problem with them is that they feel like they’re designed to become popular and didn’t naturally become fan favorites. Especially “Tattoo” from 2023, which is How to Write a Eurovision Winner: The Song. Thankfully Eurovision 2024 has no songs like this. I don’t have a solid guess for who will win this year, and I love that I don’t!

Anyway, this song is catchy but also annoying as hell. True to its title, it was designed solely to become popular, and it scored third place thus achieving this goal. The rhyme of “impossible” and “possible” in the first verse made me burst out laughing, it’s so goddamn bad. I don’t understand why Eric Saade is singing about wanting to be popular, and especially not why the chorus changes key. All the key changes make this feel like two unfinished songs stitched together and take me out of the immersion. And of course this has a predictable Swedish key change in the final chorus, why wouldn’t it? Credit where it’s due, I like that this song has a proper ending, and a dramatized one at that.

Estonia: Rockefeller Street

Artist: Getter Jaani

Language: English

Key: E♭ minor

Much like “Run Away” last year, this is a “wait, that was Eurovision?” song for people interested in Internet memes. And much like Caramelldansen (not a Eurovision song), this song became memetic through a sped-up nightcore version, so it feels weird for many people to hear it in its original tempo. I had never heard of this song until I saw somewhere people discussing which Eurovision songs became memes, I forget where.

I’d probably be fond of this song if I had grown up with memes related to it, but since it slipped under my radar all this time, this is just an average Europop song with a random swing section near the end whose singer wears a hideous dress. Peter Urban was right, this looks like something from a kids’ TV show. I will admit, the chorus is really catchy. This has become one of those Eurovision songs not associated with Eurovision at all, but with Japanese rhythm games. I find that extremely funny.

Greece: Watch My Dance

Artist: Loukas Yorkas featuring Stereo Mike

Language: English and Greek

Key: A minor, B minor

Man, this year has so many songs I have no idea what to say about. I like the bits of bouzouki, but despite the title it’s not danceable at all, just an attempt at being dramatic with English rapping and Greek singing. I’d like this more if it just had the Greek parts, but this song isn’t doing it for me.

Russia: Get You

Artist: Alexey Vorobyov

Language: English, plus an intro in Russian

Key: B major

Fun fact: The song information on screen has a trace of the German language. Alexey’s name is transliterated as Alexej Vorobjov (although in German, his last name would normally be spelled Worobjow).

I’m not a big fan of Eurovision countries hiring big-name Swedish or American producers. I prefer when countries send homegrown talent. This is just an average 2011 pop song with super-standard chord progressions and I don’t understand the purpose of the slow intro in Russian. This got last place with the juries and 7th with the televote, so 16th overall. Why do juries adore some normal 2011 pop songs but tank others?

France: Sognu

Artist: Amaury Vassili

Language: Corsican

Key: A minor, C♯ minor

Here’s something different from France! This isn’t our first time hearing the Corsican language in Eurovision, but this is the first entry entirely in Corsican, not just a few lines. France went for an opera song in Corsican this time, which cleverly shows us that Corsican sounds much closer to Italian than to French. Imagine how dramatic an orchestra would have made this sound!

I have to agree with Erica on this one: it’s well-composed but not my kind of song. Also, I agree that male opera voices are easier on the ears than female ones. It’s refreshing to see a splash of musical and linguistic diversity in this contest, because that’s what Eurovision should always be about, and he has a great voice for sure, but opera simply isn’t my thing. It was a mistake to lower the key by a whole step for Eurovision, because Amaury struggles to hit his notes at the start and sounds a little nervous throughout.

Italy: Madness of Love

Artist: Raphael Gualazzi

Language: Italian and English

Key: G minor (verses), G major (chorus)

Fourteen years after last participating in Eurovision 1997, Italy finally rejoined the contest with a classy jazz song and scored second place. Now that’s how you do a comeback!

Why can’t all the Big Five approach Eurovision the way Italy does? Why doesn’t the UK show off all their iconic genres every year? What’s preventing Spain from going party mode more often? What’s holding France back from bringing more classiness to Eurovision? And don’t even get me started on Germany, who I wish showed off their language every year, but instead hasn’t done it since 2007. Why is it only Italy who realizes their full potential in Eurovision? I know Italy has the advantage of selecting their artists using the glamorous Sanremo Festival, but it shouldn’t be hard for the Big Five to send quality acts every year.

To quell my anger about Germany’s shitty lackluster approach to Eurovision, I’ll remind myself that Germany’s victory in 2010 was likely a factor that encouraged Italy to come back. RAI and the Italian public always had a mindset that Italian music is too good for Eurovision, which is why they withdrew a few times in the 1980’s and 1990’s, then sat out the contest thirteen years in a row. In the late 2000’s, the EBU wanted Italy to turn the Big Four into Big Five, so they could have another big broadcaster to fund the contest. The Big Four had struggled to score well in most of the 2000’s, so RAI was reluctant to join this club.

But when Germany won in 2010, Italy realized that it was worth participating in Eurovision after all. And once they rejoined, what a return it was! Since their comeback, Italy has reached the top ten every year except 2014 and 2016. The rest of the Big Five should all be taking notes from Italy. Spain, the UK, and France have all been getting back on their feet in the 2020’s, and I can only hope Germany someday rethinks their approach to Eurovision.

I find it interesting that Italy chose to perform this song bilingually for Eurovision, when it won the newcomers’ section of Sanremo in Italian under the title “Follia d’amore”. Perhaps Italy was unsure whether Europe likes songs in their language, so they tested the waters with this song. The juries ranked this song first place by quite a lot (69 points above Azerbaijan), but the televoters only gave it 11th place. I think it took a little while for televoters to warm up to Italian music.

My opinion on this song: it’s not Italy’s best, but it’s an excellent return. It’s understated as far as jazz songs go and expresses an atmosphere of romance through subtlety. As with Lithuania, it combines minor and major key in a way that actually works. The verses sound mischievous and the chorus sounds more hopeful, so the minor and major keys complement each other well. I like the trumpet and saxophone parts, but my favorite section by far is that crazy piano solo. I love watching his fingers hit all the notes. The fact that he did this over a backing track arguably makes it more impressive. Bentornata all’Eurovisione, Italia! (I hope the translation is correct.)

Switzerland: In Love for a While

Artist: Anna Rossinelli

Language: English

Key: A major

I was curious what the postcard would do with Switzerland’s languages, and I absolutely love what they did. First the racecar driver reads a sign saying “Gschpür din Härzschlag!”, which is “feel your heart beat” in Swiss German, then three other signs in French, Italian, and Romansh. That’s how you know these postcards were made by Germans: they know the Swiss speak a very different type of German (but they usually write in standard German).

My notes say this sounds like YouTube tutorial music at the start and I was right, it does. The song is sweet but not my cup of tea, and her accented singing distracts me. I can see why this scored last place in the final: it just wasn’t exciting enough to capture voters’ attention. I mean, I found a lot of songs this year dull, but I can see them captivating other viewers.

United Kingdom: I Can

Artist: Blue, a boyband

Language: English

Key: G minor

This song scored 11th place, so it was the last time until 2022 that the UK reached the left side of the scoreboard. I have no damn clue how the UK did so well this year, because this song is dull synth pop with shaky muffled voices and the same generic four chord progression all the way through, as if Hungary wasn’t bad enough. And the lyrics are totally inane, which is embarrassing for a country that natively speaks English.

At least I can understand why the UK did well in 2009, because some viewers adore those shouty theater ballads. I opened my video file of Eurovision 2009 and skipped to “It’s My Time”—dear god, she’s a “volume = quality” singer, but again, some people love this kind of stuff. This song, on the other hand… the juries ranked it 22nd place, but the televoters somehow ranked it fifth. After the voting recap, Graham Norton said he would lower his expectations and hope for the UK to reach the left side of the scoreboard. Maybe the gods of Eurovision granted his wish as a reward for his modesty.

I just clicked on a random timestamp in Eurovision 2009 and got slammed in the face with the wonderful “Hora din Moldova”. If that song was in Eurovision 2011, I would’ve been like “HOLY SHIT, FINALLY! A SONG THAT’S ACTUALLY WORTH LISTENING TO AFTER ALL THIS DRIVEL!!!!” Oh hey, speaking of Moldova…

Moldova: So Lucky

Artist: Zdob și Zdub, returning from 2005

Language: English

Key: B minor

Time for Zdob și Zdub volume 2! Erica hates everything about this song, just as much as I hate “Quel cœur vas-tu briser?” (1967), “Laat me nu gaan” (1985), or “That Sounds Good to Me” (2010), and just as much as we both hate “¿Quién maneja mi barca?” (1983). As is so often the case, I’m more forgiving on a song she despises. Instead of hating it, I’m in two minds about it. The punk sections are awesome and funky, comparable to the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and they’re a great representation of rock that isn’t full-out aggressive. But the chaotic trumpet sections are an assault on the ears. The song consists mostly of the good sections (unlike “Push the Button” from 2007), but the ear assault sections have always prevented me from coming back to it often.

Oh yeah, this was the qualifier from semifinal 2 that made me laugh, whereas Ireland was the one that made me happy. I love these guys’ energy on stage and the unicycle girl is fun to watch, but they aren’t going to hit the sweet spot between chaos and cohesion until 2022.

Germany: Taken by a Stranger

Artist: Lena Meyer-Landrut, the winner of 2010

Language: English

Key: C minor

As I’ve said before, I adore when the host country’s postcard does something different from the rest. Germany’s postcard features the hosts of Eurovision 2011 preparing for the contest and ends with a crowd shouting “Fühl dein Herz schlagen!” I can tell the Germans were proud of winning the contest, which is really sweet.

Another way you can tell Germans took pride in Lena’s victory is that only a month after winning Eurovision 2010, Germany decided they’d send Lena again. Once again with guidance from Stefan Raab, they hosted a national final to pick which of twelve songs she’d sing. This landed tenth place in Eurovision 2011—not bad for a returning winner, but given the year is filled with bland crap it deserved a higher placement. The juries and televoters liked this song almost equally. This is the first time since 1958 that the host country sent last year’s winner to defend their title.

This is a returning winner entry done to perfection, exactly the opposite of Israel’s “Ding Dong” which failed to qualify. A good returning winner entry will be a worthy sequel to their prior song, but a great returning winner entry will showcase a new side of the singer while still fitting their personality to a T.

On a surface level, this seems like the total opposite of the last German entry: instead of a bouncy upbeat pop song, it’s a spooky bassy synth song with mysterious lyrics. But this actually shares some personality with “Satellite”. It’s not just haunting and mysterious, but it’s also a groovy and a little bit musically playful. The tinges of major key make the song a little quirky but no less haunting.

I love that this shows a more mysterious and artistic side to Lena, yet it fits her singing style just as well as “Satellite”. As with her last entry, she seamlessly alternates between singing and shouting in a way that magically works. In this song’s case, it’s not so much singing and shouting, but rather singing and talking. I normally hate when singers talk in the middle of their songs, but Lena blends a tinge of spoken word into her singing and it works fantastically.

We’re now 16 songs into the final and this is only the third song that truly excites me, after Ireland and Italy. That’s a far cry from the streams of bangers in 2009 and 2010. Still, it always feels good when my country sends an awesome song in a year filled with drivel.

Romania: Change

Artist: Hotel FM

Language: English

Key: B minor (verses), D major (chorus), E major (final chorus)

I have no idea what to say about this song, as has been common with Romanian entries. There’s nothing bad about it, but nothing about it that jumps at me, so it’s yet another addition to the “pleasant to listen to but doesn’t inspire me” pile. I kind of like the piano intro and I think the lead singer is a bit too quiet, that’s pretty much it.

Austria: The Secret Is Love

Artist: Nadine Beiler

Language: English

Key: F♯ major, A major, F♯ major, G major

Now time for Blatant Jury Bait: Volume 1. Can jury bait get any more obvious than this? If I was a ballad lover, I’d say something like “Oh my god, she controls her voice so well and sings with perfect conviction, you can really tell she feels those lyrics! I’m amazed she sang this well at only 20 years old!” The juries gave this song fourth place, so that’s probably exactly what they thought. The televoters ranked it second last place, so it ended up 18th overall. I don’t really like the jury/televoting average system; the jury plus televoting points system introduced in 2016 is so much better.

Unlike those snobby juries, I care most about a song being fun to listen to, which this one really isn’t. It’s three minutes of Nadine showing off her lung capacity over a power ballad. I especially hate the unaccompanied singing at the start. There are ways to make that work (e.g. “L’oiseau et l’enfant” from 1977), but she’d have to sing a clear rhythmic melody instead of drawn-out showy notes. Her singing in the intro is pretentious. Actually, the whole song is pretentious.

Azerbaijan: Running Scared (the winner)

Artist: Ell and Nikki (Eldar Gasimov and Nigar Jamal)

Language: English

Key: C major

What would you say is the most controversial winner in Eurovision history? I’d say the most controversial winners are the ones whose victories many fans don’t (or didn’t) believe were legitimate. We have four strong contenders: “Dansevise” from 1963, the quartet of winners from 1969, “Fångad av en stormvind” from 1991, and “Running Scared” from 2011. I could’ve included ones that surpassed the fan favorite at the last minute, but there’s too many of those and I want to get narrower than that. I included these four because 1969 and 1991 had tiebreakers (or lacks thereof), 1963 would’ve had a different winner if Norway hadn’t changed their votes, and Azerbaijan has more Eurovision voting scandals than any other country.

I don’t think Norway deliberately sabotaged Switzerland from winning 1963 in favor of Denmark. That just seems like an excuse for fans who don’t like “Dansevise”. I think the EBU went along with the four-way tie of 1969 because they didn’t want the show to go overtime with an improvised tiebreaker, and they had four trophies ready anyway. And even though France deserved to win 1991, I don’t buy the theories that the EBU (or god forbid, our old friend Frank Naef) abruptly invented a tiebreaker rule to prevent Amina from winning. On the other hand, given Azerbaijan’s track record of voting scandals, I wouldn’t be surprised if they turned out to have bribed or otherwise manipulated the juries into making them win this year.

I might be biased when describing the conspiracy theories about Azerbaijan’s victory, because fans only ever make conspiracy theories about a victory if they don’t like the winning song. And indeed, I do not like this song at all. I don’t hate it either, which is why it’s not my least favorite Eurovision winner (that would be “Believe” from 2008), but I absolutely hate the fact that it won. I just know I would’ve thrown a tantrum if this won 2011 and I’m no happier about it writing this review.

Musically this song is inoffensive enough that I can put it on the background and not want to turn it off (i.e. it’s radio-friendly), but if I actually like a song, that means I can pay attention while listening to it and notice intriguing musical details. What musical details does this have? Let’s see… a C-G-A-F four chord progression in the chorus (the same as the UK and Hungary this year, but offset by two measures), an even duller C-G-A chord progression in the verses, a short but slightly more interesting bridge, and some “oh, oh-oh”. It just sounds so manufactured, even for an Azerbaijani entry. I like Eurovision songs better when they brim with personality or tell a fascinating story.

The performance looks good and professional and nothing went wrong with it, so I assume that’s part of why this got so many points. Still, in a year filled with bland drivel, Italy, Germany, or maybe even Serbia should have been awarded first place for bringing something interesting. Just like Luxembourg sent the first banger in Eurovision history back in 1965, and was rewarded with victory.

Slovenia: No One

Artist: Maja Keuc

Language: English

Key: C minor, C♯ minor

And now time for Blatant Jury Bait: Volume 2. This got fourth place among the juries (holy fuck!) and 22nd (fourth last) in the televote, so 13th overall. It actually makes sense for Slovenia to send jury bait this year, since they hadn’t qualified three years in a row and thus wanted to send something normal for a change. This uses harmonic minor key as is common for Slavic countries (especially Slovenia), but otherwise it’s a standard shouty power ballad by a heavily trained singer.

Iceland: Coming Home

Artist: Sjonni’s Friends

Language: English

Key: D major

This song is best known for its sweet but sad backstory: it was composed and originally going to be performed by an Icelandic singer named Sjonni, but he unexpectedly died before the national final. Six of his friends formed a band in tribute to him, and by performing the late Sjonni’s song they won the right to represent Iceland in Eurovision.

I’m afraid I don’t have many thoughts on this song, aside from its backstory. It’s alright but nothing to write home about musically. It sounds like the ending song to a kids’ movie, that’s pretty much it. I prefer the Icelandic version a little bit, called “Aftur heim”. Maybe it would’ve seemed like a more personal tribute if it was performed in Icelandic.

Spain: Que me quiten lo bailao

Artist: Lucía Pérez

Language: Spanish

Key: D major, E♭ major

This is another Spanish entry that wants you to think it’s an authentic Spanish-sounding bop, but it’s really a regular sappy major key pop song with a Spanish coat of paint. Wikipedia says that it got some Galician folk instruments added after winning the Spanish national final; I assume it’s referring to the bagpipe and accordion.

Speaking of which, this song surprisingly has a Galician version called “Que me quiten o bailao”. Maybe not too surprising, since the singer is from Galicia. In case you didn’t know, Galician is a language of northwestern Spain that some people consider a dialect of Portuguese. It sounds very similar to the Spanish version and reminds me of those old Danish and Swedish versions of Norwegian entries, but I can sense a bit of Portuguese in it. When is Spain going to represent their regional languages in Eurovision, instead of relegating them to alternate language versions?

Ukraine: Angel

Artist: Mika Newton (Oksana Stefanivna Hrytsai)

Language: English

Key: C minor

This has some of that melancholy sound you’d expect from Ukrainian entries and has a decent chorus melody, but aside from the gorgeous sand art I don’t find it memorable enough to want to come back to it. I’m surprised it scored as high as fourth place—maybe because it was late in the running order? This song doesn’t have a Ukrainian version, but it does have a Russian version also called “Angel”. It sounds a little bit more natural in Russian.

Serbia: Čaroban (Чаробан)

Artist: Nina Radojičić

Language: Serbo-Croatian (Serbian)

Key: A♭ major, A major

Hell fucking yes, I’ve been waiting to get to this song! It can’t just be me who thinks this sounds like Japanese city pop, right? It kind of sounds like something Tatsuro Yamashita would write, though I’m sure someone who knows more about city pop than me would compare it to a different composer. Speaking of which, did you know that Mariya Takeuchi (who is best known in the West for “Plastic Love”) made a cover of “Non ho l’età” in Japanese? I was almost going to mention that in my 1964 blog post, but then I deleted it for some reason.

This song is totally awesome and up my street. It’s the exact opposite of all those boring four-chord songs this year (like Russia, the UK, and Hungary) and is filled to the brim with delightful groovy chords. I love that the verses start in a major seventh chord and the chorus ends in a different major seventh (A♭ major and D♭ major respectively). It’s usually described as a 1960’s throwback song, which makes me mad Eurovision wasn’t actually like this in the 1960’s. This song makes me wonder, is Serbian city pop a genre that’s existed the whole time? Or Yugoslav city pop, perhaps? If so, why did Yugoslavia prefer sending dreary ballads back then? As I discussed when reviewing 1994, Russia has its own style of city pop—last year I accidentally discovered a 1980’s song of this style called “Старый Телефон” and it’s surprisingly good.

Normally I think Slavic languages are better suited for slow singing than fast singing, but this song is an exception. It’s such a wonderful feel-good song about a woman who got home from a bad day and is welcomed by her husband, the most magical man in the world. It has an English version called “Magical” with faithful lyrics to the original. While this song works quite well in English, I’m glad it was kept in its original language. Sometimes I like to imagine how this would sound in Japanese.

I find it funny that in the semifinal, Nina shouted “THANK YOU, EUROPE!”, but in the final she just said “Thank you, Europe!” She must have fulfilled her high of performing on the Eurovision stage the first time around. I love when countries interrupt a year of bland crap with a pleasant surprise, though this wasn’t much of a surprise since I’ve heard it plenty before.

Georgia: One More Day

Artist: Eldrine, a metal band

Language: English

Key: G♯ minor

And so, this year ends with a somewhat Linkin Park-esque rock song. It’s got some nice synths, but I can’t understand the singer very well except her fire/desire rhyme. She has a Lena-like accent but this isn’t the kind of song suited to this accent, and I’m not feeling the rap parts. Frankly I’m just glad to be done with the songs, because these were a real drag.

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Who’s my favorite?

From this contest, I walked away with five songs I’d like to come back to: Ireland, Italy, Germany, Serbia, and the non-qualifier Belgium. Out of these, my favorite is without a doubt Serbia, Čaroban. It’s a splash of carefree delight amidst a slog of a year! That was the one qualifier from semifinal 1 that made me happy. It was also the first qualifier of semifinal 1, which is why the other nine reveals were so boring to watch. My second favorite this year is Germany, not sure about the rest.

• Belgium, 2 (1976, 2003)
• Bosnia and Herzegovina, 1 (2006)
• Denmark, 3 (1963, 2000, 2001)
• Estonia, 1 (2009)
• Finland, 3 (1968, 1983, 1989)
• France, 3 (1977, 1990, 1991)
• Germany, 4 (1956, 1979, 1982, 1999)
• Hungary, 1 (2005)
• Iceland, 1 (1992)
• Ireland, 4 (1970, 1980, 1993, 1994)
• Israel, 1 (1987)
• Italy, 1 (1958)
• Latvia, 1 (2002)
• Luxembourg, 4 (1961, 1965, 1972, 1988)
• Netherlands, 7 (1957, 1959, 1964, 1967, 1969, 1975, 1998)
• Norway, 5 (1960, 1966, 1973, 1985, 1995)
• Portugal, 3 (1971, 1984, 2008)
• Serbia, 2 (2004, 2011)
• Sweden, 2 (1974, 1996)
• Switzerland, 1 (1986)
• Turkey, 3 (1978, 1997, 2010)
• Ukraine, 1 (2007)
• United Kingdom, 2 (1962, 1981)
• (20 winners)

This is technically my first time choosing Serbia as my winner, because in 2004 I picked S+M (Serbia and Montenegro). But it’d be silly for this list to include Serbia and S+M separately.

General thoughts:

It wasn’t Germany’s fault that this year was such a slog to get through. After their meticulously trilingual drag of a show in 1983, ARD redeemed themselves by putting on one of the best, most professional shows I’ve seen yet. I can be proud of the work my country put into hosting this year. The hosts tried a little too hard at times to subvert the stereotype that Germans are humorless (which I never understood anyway), but they had good humor and were professional at the same time. The postcards this year were delightful and did exactly what postcards should do: give viewers a tour of the host country and tie in with the competing countries. Each postcard told a little story and showcased a different aspect of Germany, ranging from art museums to mountains to playgrounds and so much more. These postcards make me want to go back to Germany, as soon as I have enough vacation days.

The interval act was German-language songs “Oh Johnny” and “Klar” by Jan Delay, which have to have some of the least comprehensible German lyrics I’ve ever heard. These are decent songs, but I like songs so much better when I can clearly hear the lyrics. I agree with Erica, it’s not that fun when the interval act is just a music act.

The voting sequence was deliberately ordered to keep viewers excited, but it was boring to watch anyway. For all I care, the scores might as well have been randomly generated. I spaced out through most of the voting, but the occasional eight and ten points to Germany kept me awake. As Erica said, this year’s voting was so scattershot that Azerbaijan got bloc voted to the top. It’s a bad ending much unlike the happy ending of 2010.

A few spokespersons took the opportunity to showcase their German, so I’ll translate their words into English.

• Bulgaria: “Good evening Anke, Judith, and Stefan, you look beautiful.”
• Netherlands: “Good evening, Düsseldorf! Thank you for the fantastic show this evening!”*
• Austria: “A beautiful good evening Düsseldorf, hello Europe, greetings from Vienna. If I could, I would give twelve points to you, Anke.”
• Turkey: “Good evening Anke, you look beautiful. Good evening Düsseldorf, (good evening Europe), dearest greetings from Ankara.”
• Israel: “Good evening, Anke. Tonight Düsseldorf is not just the capital of fashion and the carnival, but the city of European music. I’m very excited to be here, and thank you for an amazing evening.”

See, I’m just like these guys. I’m indirectly showcasing my German skills too.

* The Dutch spokesperson pronounced “heute Abend” as “heuten Abend”. A hypercorrection, perhaps, because the Dutch often omit N from ends of words?

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See you next time as we finally reach the number one weirdest song in Eurovision history.

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